Rogue

Chapter 24

How long has it been? I lost track after the first month. My father hasn't let anyone visit except a few ladies to make sure I was still alive and they bring me a small meal. Why my father is feeding me just barely enough to keep me alive? I'm not sure. Maybe to keep my strength low enough to not be able to run.

My window is practically non-existent after my father walked in to me trying to pry it open. Now behind the glass are bars as if I were a danger to the outside world. So now my curtains cover the outside world that I know is out of reach for me.

A knock resonates in the room peaking my interest. The women rarely knock, and if they do, they're already halfway through the door.

His eyes are the same as I remembered, but no longer bring joy to my mind. Those blue eyes are tired and yet filled with apprehension, "Hi Addie."

I let out a tired sigh, but try to smile anyways, "Davis."

"Where have you been? I mean I- we- no one could find you." They were looking that hard for me? Why?

"I- I can't be here anymore Davis." I can't let them know where Xavier and Kai's pack is. They've stayed well-hidden for years now, and if my father is desperate enough to find them who knows what will happen to both packs.

"Why Addison? What's so bad about staying here? If..." He lets out an awkward sigh and I can feel the tension growing, "If it's about me, you... you don't have to worry about it."

Then it hits me. They have brought in their trojan horse. They brought in the one man they thought I'd speak and listen to in order to convince me to do their bidding for them.

"This has nothing to do with that Davis..." I mean sure, I went for a run that night because they were forcing Davis and I to stay apart, but in my heart I knew we would never work.

"Good! Truly! I... Addie... you know I loved you," He pauses struggling to find his words. I think the word you're looking for is 'but', "but... what we had just wasn't enough."

His eyes are sad, but more regretful at his failed attempt to be honest with me while trying to spare my feelings. I know what he means though. Our love was a friendship type of love, and it took me leaving for us to realize that.

"I know."

I'm not sure how long we just sit here for all I can focus on is the aching in my bones. I recognize this feeling as something that would come and go as my mates would be gone for a long while. But it was more of a dull ache, and my wolf would become restless without their touch. Now? Now I feel like I've been sleeping on rocks, and my wolf is worn out. We're social creatures. Living in solitude for too long could drive one mad. Not to sound stupid, but the lack of affection is weighing on my wolf and me. 

The ache in my heart due to the distance between me and my mates is unbearable, but the pain I'm starting to feel in my body is nothing I want to feel ever again. And not being marked makes the feeling even worse. It's like my body is convincing itself I was rejected. The thought makes me sick.

"Jaxon went wild once you left, ya know?" Davis's voice breaks through the mind-splitting migraine emerging in my brain, snapping all my attention to him, "When you never came home, he grew restless. I don't know if he ever really slept. Losing you- I mean when my father told me you were going to mate with Jaxon, I broke a few things... but it was nothing like what Jaxon went through."

What is he trying to say? Davis forces himself to look my in the eyes, "He was ready to start wars for you when he thought he lost you. And me? I just punched a fucking wall." He scoffs at his behavior as if hating himself for not caring as much as Jaxon did, "I guess we know who truly loved you more."

Not gonna lie that kinda hurt. Certainly not something you would usually want to hear from your ex-fiancé, but I know what he means. "I'm not sure if I should be offended or honored." I try to force a laugh, but it comes out as a pained cough.

"I don't mean to hurt your pride, but... I guess I always saw it. Maybe I was just too selfish to ever let him have you. Not that he was really an option being alpha and all. Maybe this whole 'you and me' was just the second choice."

I guess I never considered that. Yes, I did have a crush on Jaxon when I was little, but it was true, his alpha title made him off limits. What if he wasn't alpha? Would we have tried a relationship all those years ago? Where would I be now?

What am I saying!? Snap out of it Addison, you have a mate! No, not only one, but two! Two mates who love you and will find you. 

It's been weeks. No one's coming for you. I rub out my temples as if it'd rub out my negative thoughts, but it only seems to grow. If they loved you they would've marked you. They know where you live, they could've found you days, even weeks, ago. Why does it all matter? You're destined to be alone anyways.

Is this how a lone rogue feels when they are ostracized? Left alone to go mad without a pack. I can understand why some rogues get so aggressive if their thoughts are thrice as bad and negative as mine. 

Or maybe you're just weak.

"Well I guess I'll let you rest." Davis smiles, but then cringes as if he's just now taken in my weakened state. I'm worn down. I can feel it and I'm sure he can see it clear on my face, but I smile and nod anyways. I'm definitely not sleeping tonight. 

Ahh I feel like things are going so fast!... Just me?

Where the heck of my two husbands and why haven't they gone all knight in shining amour on my girl Addison yet!? 

Also... I hate to say it but I think we're rearing closer to the finish line... So with that thought I have a question:

How do you guys feel about bonus chapters? I'm just trying to get a feel on what I should involve in the actual story and what should just be extra side chapters? If you guys want some bonus chapters later in the future I am open to suggestions!

I honestly love all my readers here, and your comments always make me smile. Thank you for being a part of this story with me! 

Love you all! Have a great day.