Your Grace - Burak Çelik

CHAPTER 14

T/W: Pills/Drugs

The day never seemed to end.

Ayedah's heart continuously raced in her chest as it went by, and though the hours snailed by, before she knew it it was time she returned home. The whole twelve hours she spent on set seemed to go by slowly, yet in a blur as she worked- and it was unclear to her if she was actually focused on her tasks or not. Her heart was ridden with guilt from losing her temper with Burak- her new friend who had told her just the previous day that he cared about her and was not going to judge her- and the look on his face never left her mind. She had tried to avoid him the entire day, but of course, that was impossible; not one second of the day went by without her thinking about him.

And only him.

If that was not enough, many of the scenes she was overlooking the shooting of for Episodes 3 and 4 of Season 2 were scenes with Goktug, so she had to supervise him as she worked. But she never made eye contact, and kept her eyes on her notes unless she were working on filming scenes with other actors. She noticed out of the bare corner of her eye- and if she didn't physically see it, she could definitely feel it- that Burak had tried to catch her gaze, and often glanced at her. But by the time he had finished his last scene for the day along with Yigit, he had given up on trying to catch her attention, which Ayedah had mixed feelings about. The anger in her did not want his attention, and forbade her from letting him have hers. Yet the calmer side, the smaller yet forgiving part of her that was muffled out by the heart-clenching barks of her angrier side, wanted him to look at her, and coated her heart in guilt for the way she had treated him. That part of her wanted to speak to him, perhaps say something and clear the air between them immediately.

But alas, as it always did, her anger won over. She did not try to speak to him, look at him, or clear the air. But still, he did not leave her mind, and even at the end of the day, the regretful and rejected look on his face continued to haunt her head.

It was 4:30 PM, and Ayedah had finally- with some difficulty, especially as she had misplaced the pen she usually used and had to write with a different one- finished the work she was assigned to do for the day. She gathered up all her papers after writing up a few shooting plans for coming episodes, spending some time editing the characters' scripts and sending off an email to Mehmet Bozdag, informing him of the day's work and how the cast did. She refrained, of course, from mentioning what happened between her and Burak.

"Well, perhaps this is best," she murmured to herself thoughtfully as she sent off the email. "We'll just be colleagues. Professional acquaintances. It wouldn't interfere with our work, just as it may if we were friends. I'm glad this all happened early on, before it would be more difficult to let go." She tried to convince herself by saying it out loud, but almost groaned when her stubborn heart refused to accept what the rational part of her mind tried to state. Ayedah was very glad none of the other writers were present that day- for she knew that if they were, she would have made a massive fool of herself.

As she packed up her notes in their files as well as her laptop into her bag, and put on her coat there was a knock at the door. She expected it to be Ozge, calling her to hurry up so they would get home and eat, so she quickly zipped up her coat and slung her bag over her shoulder before opening the door. To her surprise and horror, it was Burak standing in front of her, and he who knocked at the door- Burak Celik, not Burak Ozcivit(though at that point in time, Ayedah would probably have preferred Ozcivit in her presence instead of Celik). She swallowed slightly, and Burak held out a pen, not meeting her eyes as his were fixed firmly on the ground. "You dropped this just now when you fell," he said quietly, and Ayedah took it from him. So that's where it was, she thought. It must have fallen out of my pocket when I tripped in the mud and fell, and when he caught me... She looked at him for a while, and for a brief moment he met her eyes- and in that brief moment, she once again saw the rejection in his eyes. The two immediately broke their gazes, and Ayedah pushed past him silently without another word, stuffing her pen into her pocket.