Your Grace - Burak Çelik

CHAPTER 44

A/N: I think I'm falling back into my messy writing phase again cuz of depressies but I hope you guys enjoy this anyway ehe 😅🥰 + this is my KO Characters preference, no hate please <3

"Before we begin, may I ask you a question first?" asked Dr. Reyhana, and Ayedah nodded.

"Please," she offered, and the psychiatrist nodded. "Have you visited another professional to discuss your mental health before?" she asked. "Another psychiatrist, or a psychotherapist?" "I have been to see a few psychiatrists in the past," answered Ayedah. "The first one I met was a government psychiatrist in London when I was fifteen years old, and she diagnosed me with Bipolar I, and deemed medication necessary."

"Yes, I have knowledge of your diagnosis," nodded Dr. Reyhana. "As well as the type of medication that you take, from your file that you gave in for registration earlier, and from the psychiatrist who looked after you during your hospital stay, and recommended me to you. So, you have Bipolar disorder type I?" "Yes," confirmed Ayedah. "I do." "Does anyone in your family have other psychiatric disorders, if there are none that possess Bipolar disorder?" asked Dr. Reyhana. "I have to ask, for genetics do play a role in mental disorders." "No, not to my knowledge," answered Ayedah. "It has just been me. I am the only one in my family who has Bipolar disorder."

"How long did you experience symptoms before you were diagnosed?"

"Since I was around thirteen or fourteen."

"And you have tried or been on medication for it?"

"Yes. I have been on medication for it."

"However, you recently experienced a manic episode?"

"Yes," answered Ayedah, her chest tightening at the memory. "I did. I stopped taking my medication sometime toward the end of April." "Are you on medication now?" asked Dr. Reyhana, and Ayedah nodded. "I am."

"Alright," said Dr. Reyhana, and jotted down a few notes in her notebook. "So, how long have you been on this medication? Since you were diagnosed, I assume?" "No," said Ayedah. "I was only able to start medicating when I turned eighteen." "And why is that, may I ask?" asked the psychiatrist. "Didn't the government psychiatrist you see deem medication necessary for your condition?" "She did," answered Ayedah. "But at the time I was still underage, and my parents withdrew me from seeing her, and hired a private psychiatrist who was under their control." "What do you mean by under their control, Ayedah?" asked Dr. Reyhana.

"Neither of my parents liked to believe that I had a mental disorder, and refused to have me put on medication," explained Ayedah. "The child psychiatrist they had chosen for me was to handle me in such a way that it neither looked like I needed medication, nor did it look as though I was in any serious trouble that my parents needed to compromise their own wishes for me. However, she could not deny my diagnosis of Bipolar disorder." "I see," said Dr. Reyhana. "It must have been difficult for you." Ayedah looked down at her hands, as her fingers fidgeted with each other. "It was," she answered. "But I managed to survive until I turned eighteen, and when I moved to Oxford to study, I visited a psychiatrist at the hospital there and was prescribed medication, and began to use it behind my parents' back. I have been using the same type of medication ever since."

"Did they find out?" asked the psychiatrist, and Ayedah shook her head. "No, they never got the chance to," she said softly. "They, er, passed away. Just a few years ago." "My condolences," said Dr. Reyhana in a kind voice. "I believe speaking of your family and your background is difficult for you?" "It is," admitted Ayedah, and the psychiatrist nodded. "Do not worry, we will go slowly," she smiled at her. "I do encourage you to open up, but please do not force yourself. If you are uncomfortable speaking about your background regarding your family and upbringing, we do not need to discuss it until you are alright with it." "Okay," said Ayedah gratefully. "Thank you."