Stupid Supergirl AU's

I Saved The City

"Okay but whenever Kara says I saved the city, I have to run outside and make sure my building is still standing." Lena pointed out.
"Trueee, Kara threw my car at a villain the other day. Turns out, the insurance I have only covers Barry, Sara and Mick damaging it." Kelly crossed her arm, "Like what in the flipping pancake? All because I didn't want to pay for the third package."
"There was one time Kara threw J'onn at an alien and he broke his arm." Lena added.
"That was all J'onn's fault. He said he'd be fine." Kara defended herself.
"What about the time you threw my whole ass apartment building at Reign?" Lena crossed her arms.
"Thank god that didn't make it into the show." Kara said relieved.
"What show?" Nia questioned.
"The show about us, the Supergirl show. It's pretty good. Lena's character definitely wants to smash my character." Kara have a cheeky smile, "Kinda like real life."
"Moving in. What about that time Kara literally destroyed someone's house and all she said was have a potsticker and flew off? Half the city probably wants to die." Alex pointed out.
"I'm part of that half."
"Lena no!" Kara and Kelly jinxed.
"What? You guys all know this already." Lena sipped her scotch.
"Something's wrong with Lena, she's drinking scotch."
"Kara, I will literally give you a list of things wrong with Lena. It's alphabetised and the events have the time, location and date." Kelly reached into her bag.
"You just carry Lena's file around?"
"Lena calls for emergency therapy sessions more than I get laid." Kelly admitted.
"The only reason you don't get laid is because Lena keeps interrupting so she can get a therapy session." Alex glared at Lena.
"Yeahh as sorry as I am about that, that was a really therapeutic session." Lena shrugged.
"You were in our bed!" Alex exclaimed.
"We were naked." Kelly added.
"And you forgot to carry my therapy whiskey with you."
"Wait, why were you in their bed?" Kara raised her eyebrow.
"They wouldn't come out here so I went in. I did send a text before I walked in." Lena looked towards Alex, "Nice tattoo by the way."
"Lena!" Kara exclaimed.
"What?! It's a cool tattoo!" Lena defended herself, "I want one."
"Lena, you can't even get vaccinated without crying."
"Kara, honey, as much as I want to take the fall for that, you're the one who cries when they get vaccinated." Lena replied, "I don't cry, I like pain. And everyone in this room knows I'm a bottom."
"Wait, you're a bottom?" Nia questioned, "Kara's the top?" Nia looked between the two of them, "How? How does Kara top you?"
"Pretty easily actually. I have mommy issues." Lena sipped her scotch.