t h i r t y

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[☆ Mann Bharya is mentioned, but this was written before the 2.0 was released and the characters are not in 2021 anyway, so we're talking about the first one. Also, Sidharth's death was so sudden, please don't take life too seriously, keep praying, stay on the right path and enjoy whatever's on your plate as long as it is there. ☆
Enjoy!]

We sit for breakfast and he's still too silent.

I try to break the ice this time, "Can I join office?"

He looks up at me, astonished.

"Yes, of course." His jaw clenches at the bite he's chewing.

The place goes silent again.

"Won't you ask me when I wanna start?"

He looks up with the red eyes he's been carrying the whole morning. Did he sleep last night?

"When do you want to start?"

"How about today?"

He nods, not as happy as I thought he would be. Not happy at all, actually. He's been the same way since yesterday.

I finally gain enough courage, "I tried wearing those dresses, all of them one by one. It's just that... they don't suit me."

"It's okay Sawera, wear them or throw them away, it's your choice."

He leaves the table.

I'd sit here and cry but Lindsay's waiting to clean the table.

~~~

I don't remember her name, but the woman that replaced Kylie is even prettier.

~~~

I haven't seen his family in so long, and had bhabhi and bhai not appeared here suddenly I wouldn't have realised that.

"So, we wanted to tell you guys something. Ammi was insisting on telling you two yesterday on the phone but we decided to come here and give you this good news by ourselves."

How impatient would the Sawera from seven months ago get?

Hell of a disease. More than half of the time makes me wish I was dead but right now I'd like to thank it. Had it not existed, I'd still be chirpy and would have blurted out whatever came in my mind. Had I right now blurted out what just came in my mind, bhabhi would never talk to me.

But had this disease not engulfed my entire being, I would not have been so forgetful and I would have known that it's been more than seven months to her miscarriage and a pregnancy so long so as to get noticed with a baby bump is possible.

I move my eyes away from her belly and congratulate her.

The worst thing is that before anything, before greetings and hellos; the first look, my first impression of a girl mainly consists of her body mass.

Azaan's new secretary's thinner than a stick. Since the last time I saw bhabhi, I'm sure she has gained at least twelve pounds.

And yet I look worse than her.

By God, I would kill to stop these thoughts from appearing in my head.

Anxiety, boredom, stress.

They bid byes and get out.

"Sawera, you know I found the best TV show ever." Azaan says as I sit on the TV and proceeds to show me F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Wallahi, I'm sick of his sense of humor.

~~~

While I sit on the vanity table and look at my undefined jaw, I count the amount of times I've listened to Mann Bharya and thought of going to Azaan and telling him that I'm not happy with this marriage.

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