Up No More

chapter eighteen

not proofread !!

🔳

[one week later]

it had been a week, since that incident and things had gotten even worse.

taehyung wasn't allowed to celebrate his birthday with any friends— due to seojuns wishes. he spent his birthday alone, with no friends or family— just his 'boyfriend'

taehyungs pov

"s-seojun, can i go grocery shopping?" i asked hesitantly, i knew the answer was going to be 'no' but there was only rice & kimchi left in our cupboards.

"what do you think the answer will be, baby?" seojun said, with an eyebrow raised.

"no?"

seojun hummed, drinking the little bit left in his beer can and squashing it. he took my hand and guided me to stand in front of him.

"taehyung, i can't have you getting stressed and passing out on the street." seojun rubbed my thighs, getting closer to my no-no area.

i removed his hands slowly, trying not make it obvious that i was doing so.
as seojun got angry when i asked him to stop touching me, three days ago when he pinched me for saying so.

"we can go only go together..if you're so desperate." seojun teased, smiling to himself self.

"sit." he said, i sat next to him rolling my eyes.

"on me, darling." he spoke again, so i straddled him.

"you know i do this because i want you to be healthy, and i love you so much." he said, a phrase he's been using quite often this week.

i didn't say anything back and that annoyed him, anything i did that wasn't robotic-like he hated. it's almost like he hated how he couldn't control me and how i had feelings.

"why can't i go by myself, junie~" i said again, almost tearing up because of how frustrated i was getting.

"you already know why, darling, how about we go cuddle." seojun patted my hair, fixing it in certain areas.

'go cuddle' was just his way of saying 'let's go have sex'

"you look pretty today, my love, i would never let you go out like this... what if someone snatched you." seojun massaged my skin, kneading my waist.

"c'mon." he lifted me up and i wrapped my hands around his neck.

he threw me onto the bed and i just knew what was going to happen.

<timeskip>

"that was good.." seojun panted, tying his condom and throwing it in the trash can.

"yeah, it was." i said even though it wasn't good at all, seojun was horrible at finding my sensitive spots. he was only busy in pleasuring himself.

'i miss jungkook.' i thought.

"tae, what are you thinking about?" seojun asked, tucking himself into bed.

"im going to work tomorrow, right?" i said, seojun chuckled lightly.

"of course, but turn on your 360." seojun smiled, i rolled my eyes for the second time today.

"seojun, i'm tired of this. i'm tired of asking for permission from you. i'm not your property!" i snapped, i was holding it in for a week— i definitely couldn't go another week.

"watch it, taehyung." he warned, referring to my tone and looking at me with 'red' eyes.

i stayed quiet and he spoke up, "taehyung."

"what," i replied.

"i love you." he said softly, softening his gaze.

i completely ignored him and he slapped my face.

my bottom lip quivered as i held my reddened cheek.

"i do it because i love you, hm." seojun leaned down and kissed my hand that was holding my cheek.

"say it back, my love." he stared into my teary eyes.

"no." i said shakily, trying hard to not let any tears fall.

"taehyung, you're asking for this." seojun said as he slapped my face again.

*SLAP*

this time it was harder and more painful, he sent another punch to my face, make me feel drowsy. he was a strong man with really heavy hands. i closed my eyes and took all of the abuse.

"you deserve it all." he said cunningly before leaving one more slap on my face and turning the other way because he was satisfied.

i finally let a tear fall, 'i'm such an idiot, i cant leave him because i love him too much' i thought to myself.

that night, i just couldn't sleep, i was awake until 4am, thinking about my current situation. i don't want to live like this, i don't want to live at all—

—i just couldn't take it no more, i took multiple sleeping pills that were in the cabinet of our bathroom. and it knocked me out.

i didn't want to be up no more.

🔳

as you all know the story is inspired by twices song 'UP NO MORE' and it is about insomnia.
💕