Learning To Love

chapter 3

I stuffed my uniform into my work bag, along with my shoes and cap. I slipped through the front door as quickly as I could and relief drowned me when I successfully made it to my car. I clutched the steering wheel, Turing my knuckles white.

I hated living in this house. I hated being miserable, never feeling like I was actually living. It made the hole in my chest even bigger. The only thing that brought me joy was this band, this group. I couldn't lose it. I couldn't let it slip away from me. I would do anything to keep it.

Taking a heavy and jagged breath, I turned the ignition and backed out the drive. The car was warm and comforting, the leather seats sizzled and burned against my back. But I didn't mind. Nothing felt worse than the way I felt mentally. It was actually nice in comparison.

It was the knowing that I broke everything from a drunk and reckless mistake. That'd I'd be stuck alone again. The thoughts haunted me in waves, walking away and coming back. No matter how hard I tried to push them away, I constantly worried about it.

I parked the car in the staff parking and headed towards the coffee shop. Our coffeeshop looked like an old white picket house. I guess I lied when I said my friends was the only thing that made me happy, becuase this place did too. It was called "Omens Coffee Club" and it's been open for 30 years. A little Greek couple opened it together, Gloria and Allen.

But Allen passed away a year ago, and thats when I saw the hiring sign in their window. Gloria was old and frail, and when her husband died, she sold the business to her kids. Mary and Matilda were the sisters who ran it now. I liked them becuase they knew how to laugh, and knew how to make you laugh.

Matilda was five years younger than Mary who was 31. Matilda and I were a little closer, on break she loved to put braids in my hair and we talked a lot about clothes. Our relationship was sort of like asiblings, we fought and argued, but it never went to the heart and at the end of the day we were laughing and smiling as always.

Mary and I talked more about like goals and feelings. We're weren't as playful, and we didn't braid hair or anything. We were a little more real and sarcastic. I like the contrast between them a lot.

As I walked through the front door of the building, I looked out at all the tables scattered across the oak hardwood floor. I headed towards the counter at the back and typed the pin in for the employee door. Mary was grinding coffee and smiled at me as I walked in.

"Hey there Ollie! When you punch in, could you bring the heavy box of beans out from the storage. We couldn't lift it!"

"Of course!" I called as I walked into the employee bathroom and changed into the uniform. I loved our uniform. It was black trousers, with a beige long sleeve top, there was a collared shirt that had short sleeves but I liked hiding my tattoos. Its not that I liked hiding them, its that it made me feel a little better about myself.

I tied my hair back and wrapped the hairnet around it, topping it off with our little black cap that had the logo. The logo was the coffee shops name, and a little mug above it.

I stepped out and punched into the clock and waited for the receipt to print. When finished, I stuffed it into my pocket and headed towards the storage at the back. The big box had scuff marks all over it, I could see they really struggled to get it off the shelf even.

I chuckled as I lifted it onto my foot, and got both hands under. It took a decent amount of strength. Believe it or not, but coffee beans were heavy.

Bringing the box to the kitchen, I placed it on a stainless steel table and opened it, dated the bags and filled the shelf below. Matilda walked in from the back door after taking the garbage out.