Blue Phoenix - MCU Civil War Replacement

Chapter Twenty Nine

By the time we got Zemo handed off to Everett and made it back to the compound everyone was exhausted. It felt like we'd been on the jet for days and I was extremely ready to crawl into my bed, but as tired as I was my mind had a hard time settling down enough so that I could actually sleep.

Finally giving up sleeping as the sun start rising, washing my room in dim light I gently move Tony's arm from around my stomach so I can slide out of bed without waking him. I pause at the edge of the bed, watching Tony sleep and I almost crawl back into bed just to be near him but I know if I did I'd end up waking him too and one of us should get some sleep.

Padding barefoot down the hall I pause outside of Bucky's room hearing him muttering. I knock softly and stick my head in when he doesn't answer and see him sleeping on a pad on the floor beside the coffee table next to the couch. He was asleep, and slightly thrashing while he continues muttering in several different languages. He was having another nightmare and it broke my heart. Being back there had been hard for me and I hadn't been there as long as he had.

I close the door behind me and start walking to Bucky but before I can reach him he sits bolt upright and swings his arm catching the lamp and shattering it against the wall beside me. He was sweating and breathing hard as he searches the room until his eyes land on me. I close the distance and squat down in front of him, smiling at him. He scoots away from me, looking away from me and I can see a muscle working in his jaw as he tries to even out his breathing.

"Are you scared of me?" I ask quietly.

"I don't want to hurt you." He growls through clinched teeth, still not looking at me.

"You won't. Come here."

I walk on my knees towards him and wrap my arms around him shoulders, holding him tight and kiss his forehead. After a moment he releases a breath and wraps his arms around my waist, pressing his face into my neck. I can feel his muscles slowly relax as I hold him close, his breathing evening out until he sighs pulling away from me slightly but keeping his arms around me.

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for Buck." I smile, tucking his hair behind his ears and kiss his forehead again. "Why are you sleeping on the floor?"

"Bed's too soft." He admits, a chuckle escaping looking slightly embarrassed.

"I'll see what we can do to fix that until you're used to it. You know, it's a common thing for soldiers returning home. Do you want to talk about the nightmare?"

He shakes his head and looks away. The things Hydra made him do haunted him and he'd started opening up a bit before we had to catch Zemo but being back there probably made things worse for him. I hated that I couldn't make the ghosts just go away, he had such a warm and loving soul. Gently hooking my finger under his chin I turn his face back to me, smiling sadly as he meets my gaze with tears pooling in his eyes.

"You don't have to hide from me Buck. I love you no matter what and I always will."

"You don't know what I've done. If you did..." he trails off.

"I'd love you anyway. Those things, they weren't you, not really. In a few hours your name will be cleared and you'll be given amnesty, the whole world will know James Buchanan Barnes isn't responsible for the deeds of the Winter Soldier." I say, cupping his face with my hands, smiling as tears pool in my eyes as well.

"I'm not sure I'm worth the trouble. I'm broken Kenna."

"Then I guess it's a good thing I'm an excellent fixer of broken things. I refuse to give up on you or let you give up on yourself. I doubt Steve will either. You have all of us here, you're a part of this family Buck."