Forever & Always {chandler riggs}

Chapter 28- I can't do this

Samantha's POV

When those words came out I froze. My heart. I don't know but my heart. It hurt, felt good, all of it.

"I know. You can't date me because of Chandler." Hayes said.
My heart broke into a million pieces.
He was crying because of me.
Me. Me. Me. Me. ME.
He loved me. Wanted me. But can't have me.

"Hayes..." I said feeling so freakin bad.
"I'm sorry I know I shouldn't do this to you. Your in love with Chandler and I know that. I'm in love with you and now you know that." Hayes said.
"Hayes I do have feelings for you still."I managed to say.

Hayes smiled a very small smile.
"But it's true what you said. I'm sorry but it is." I said feeling so bad again.
"I know but you just needed to know." Hayes said.
"We can be friends Hayes and I'll always keep that promise but we can't-" I said but Hayes interrupted.

"Date. I know Sam." Hayes said sadly.
I sighed.
"We can hang out tomorrow or tonight." I said trying to think of something to make him feel better.
Hayes nodded.
"I'll text you. I'm gonna go back home." Hayes said giving me a small squeeze and kissing my head.

I smiled and he walked away and went in his car and drove off. I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. I needed to go back in there with Chandler and Averie but I can't. I need to think and breathe.

I sat on the curb and sighed. How can you love so many people so much? Hayes I do still love to be honest. I always have. I just can't. I love Chandler more. Way more.

The door of the restaurant opened. I looked up to see Chandler walking over to me. He sat beside me and hugged me. I laid my head on his shoulder.

"You saw the whole thing didn't you?" I asked.
"Part of being an over protective boyfriend." Chandler said kissing my head.
"Did you hear?" I asked.
Chandler shook his head.

"Just watched." Chandler said.
"Do you want me to tell you?" I asked.
Chandler nodded unsure.
"Hayes told me he loved me. He was crying because of me. ME. He said he was crying because he couldn't have me because I love you." I said sighing at the end.

"I know he does." Chandler said.
"How?" I asked.
"The way he looks at you like you do when you love someone." Chandler said.
"Your not mad?" I asked.
He shook his head.

"I trust you." Chandler said.
I smiled and kissed his lips.
"I still do have feelings for him." I admitted.
"I know." Chandler said.
I sighed.
"Same way how but I know you love me more." Chandler said.

I smiled feeling a little relief come off of me.
"God your the best." I said wrapping my arms around him.
He chuckled and kissed my head.
"I'm also hanging out with him later or tomorrow." I said.
Chandler kissed my head again.

"Sam I trust you and I promise that." Chandler said looking at me.
I smiled.
I'm freaking out to much.
"Come on let's go back in." I said getting up.
I walked with Chandler back in the restaurant. We sat down and ate.

*next day*

I woke up in my room. I fell asleep late last night. Averie left already and I miss her like crazy. We dropped off Chandler before we came back home. I miss him too. I sat up and grabbed my phone. Hayes texted me.

Hayes: Can I come to your house at 12:00?

I looked at the time, 1:00. I gasped and jumped out of bed. I grabbed a sweat shirt and sweat pants and put them on. I took a shower last night. I brushed my hair and put it in a messy bun. I brushed my teeth and put on deodorant and perfume then ran downstairs.

Hayes and my mom were talking.
"Oh my god I'm so sorry!" I said hugging Hayes.
He chuckled and hugged back.
"It's okay." Hayes said rubbing my back.

"I don't care where you go but be home by dinner." My mom said opening the dishwasher.
I nodded.
"I'm gonna go put on my shoes and change pants." I said running upstairs.
I quickly changed into shorts and put on my black bobs.

I grabbed my phone and ran downstairs.
Hayes smiled.
"Bye mom love you!" I said walking out of the house and shutting the door.
"So what are we gonna do?" I asked as we walked on the side walk.

"Park or woods or something else I don't know." Hayes said.
"Park." I said smiling and laughing.
Hayes laughed.
He started running and I ran after him and jumped on his back.
He lost his balance and fell down. We both couldn't stop laughing.

I gasped for air still laughing.
I sat up and Hayes did too.
My hair fell down because my pony tail popped. Great.
Hayes smiled at me and I smiled and stood up.
We both had grass all over us.

I laughed and wiped it off. We walked to the park. I jumped on Hayes back and held on tight. Hayes spun around making him laugh and me squeal.
Hayes began running to the park. When we got there, we went to the swings. I sat down and Hayes sat down beside me.

We swung slowly.
"I'm sorry for coming out on you like that." Hayes said looking at me then the ground.
"Don't worry about it. You wanted to tell me how you feel." I said looking at Hayes who was already looking at me.
"It just sucks to love someone you can't have." Hayes said looking at me then the sky.

"I know I'm sorry." I said looking at my feet.
"You don't know." Hayes said looking at me.
I shook my head and got up. I walked to the woods.
"You've never loved someone that was dating someone at the time you loved them." Hayes said following me.

I stopped in my tracks and turned around.
"I have Hayes, I have." I said looking at him.
Hayes looked at me like I was lying.
"Who then?" Hayes asked stubbornly.
I shook my head and walked again.
"Who?!?" Hayes asked running after me.

I didn't answer.
"Who?!?" Hayes asked louder.
I didn't answer.
Hayes grabbed my arm and turned me around.
"Who?" Hayes asked quieter.
"Why would you care?" I asked looking at him in the eyes.

He shook his head.
"Because I care about you." Hayes said looking at my eyes.
"You really wanna know don't you?" I asked walking again.
"Yes I do Sam." Hayes said following me.

I stopped in my tracks again and turned around.
Hayes stopped and was 10ft away from me.
"You Hayes you. We broke up and you loved that girl or cared about her. I was freakin jealous. It sucked because I still had feelings but I couldn't have you." I said looking at the ground.

Hayes stood there at first.
He walked up to me to were there was only an inch between us. He put his hand under my chin and lift my head up so I could face him. Oh my god no. He looked in my eyes and kissed me.

The bad thing was, I kissed back. His hands moved up my waist and he pulled me closer. I opened my eyes and saw Chandler kissing me. I'm loosing it.
I moved my hands to his hair and it didn't feel like Chandlers.

I opened my eyes to see Hayes instead. I shook my head and pulled away. I ran. I just ran. I ran away back home. I ran to Chandlers. I don't know why but I did. I knocked on his door and fell on the floor crying.

The door opened and Chandler was there.
"Oh my god." Chandler said coming closer.
I shoved him away and he was confused.
"Your gonna hate me. Your gonna wanna break up with me. You trusted me. I can't do this." I said then broke down in tears.

I can't do this.