Never Say Forever (LAMS READERS CHOICE)

Chapter Twenty Six

Option Two: Tell him the truth

"John? Your silence is worrying me a little bit.." Alex says wearily. "Is he telling the truth?"

I hesitate but nod. The truth was going to come out eventually, might as well tell him now before he gets some twisted version of the story. "I'll explain.. But maybe we should sit down first.."

He frowns gently but moves out of the way so I can go into the guest bedroom. I sit down on the bed and Alex sits next to me, raising an eyebrow worriedly.

"Just.. Promise me you won't hate me after I tell you." I say.

"Jesus, John, it can't really be that bad, could it?" He asks. I just sigh in response and he frowns even more. "Well.. Okay then. Go ahead."

I bite my lower lip and then take a deep breath. "So.. We've known each other since I moved to New York when I was almost seventeen, right?" He nods quietly. "Well, before I moved up here, I had a girlfriend in South Carolina. Her name was Martha Manning. My father didn't approve of her so we kept our relationship a secret."

"Your father was always.. Uptight.." Alex adds in.

"Yeah, no kidding.." I huff and then move my hair back from my face awkwardly, looking at my lap. "Anyway, Martha and I were messing around for a little while and one day.. Well I saw a test on the counter. It was positive. And then I found a couple more in the trash that were also positive. She hadn't told me anything, but I freaked out and left her house right away. I wasn't ready to be a dad."

I look at Alex to see his reaction and see him furrowing his eyebrows. "And then what?" He asks.

"I.. Convinced my dad that I wanted to move to New York to go to a better school. Made up some bullshit so I didn't have to deal with the situation at hand." I shake my head. "I was so stupid.. I regretted it years later, but I cut off all connections to Martha and had no way to make it up to her."

Alex's eyes widened a little. He was shocked. I don't know what expression was to come after shocked, but I had a feeling it wasn't going to be a good one.

"John? How could you do such a thing to that poor girl?" He asks. "I mean, I get it, you were young you aren't perfect, but you just left her to raise a child on her own?"

"I know, it's terrible. I was just so scared.." I place my head in my hands. "And by the time I actually wanted to fix my mistakes, there was no possible way for me to do so."

"Why are you just now telling me this, John? Why did you wait twelve years to tell me the truth?" He asks.

"What was I supposed to say? 'Oh, hey Alex, I know we just met, but by the way I have a kid who lives in South Carolina who probably knows nothing about me.' That kind of stuff doesn't just come up in conversation, you know." I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, but what happened to the best friends don't keep secrets rule?" He tilts his head. "I mean, come on, I've shared pretty much my whole life with you. And now all of a sudden I'm finding out all these things about you? I don't even know who you are anymore!"

"Well damn, Alex. I didn't realize I was the only one who kept secrets." I scoff.

"When have I kept a secret from you?"

"How about when you and Elizabeth were first considering getting a divorce? You didn't tell me about any of that business going on." I say, to which he just gives an annoyed gesture.

"It was a personal family matter, John, it didn't concern you." He says, looking unamused.

"Okay, fine. And what about the time you faked your own death? Kept it a secret that you were still alive and, might I add, in perfectly good condition?" He stops for a moment and stares at me. "Yeah, you wanna talk about leaving kids behind? At least mine was spared the heartbreak from never knowing me."