RED | nyukyu ✓

twenty two

𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨 : 𝐢'𝐦 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮
❝ even if i become more blurry to your sight don't forget that i'm here. ❞
⁻ ˣ¹ ⁻

ᵕ̈♡˳೫˚∗

"people are staring at us," chanhee muttered, subconsciously fixing his mask as they made their way to the restaurant which was rather close to their university. chanhee felt changmin pull slightly on his hand but for some odd reason, despite people's gaze, chanhee still refused to let go of changmin with them having had their hands intertwined since the dance room. "it doesn't bother me that much but does it bother you?" changmin shook his head, chanhee nodding and looking anywhere else but at the boy next to him.

despite the claustrophobic feeling chanhee always experienced when he was surrounded by people who had their eyes practically glued onto him, with changmin next to him, he felt a sense of reassurance, something he only felt with younghoon. was changmin slowly becoming someone that chanhee trusted?

the thought scared him to death. he knew it shouldn't but knowing that changmin had feelings for him was not helping in the slightest, chanhee thinking that perhaps, changmin had set unrealistic expectations onto him to be someone far from who he truly was and the thought that that perceived person was who changmin probably wanted to be friends with made chanhee feel a numbing coldness inside.

sure, changmin liked him now and wanted to spend time with him but what if he, like many others, gave up trying to see the good in him? what if he began viewing him as a good for nothing prick who only valued himself? what if he-

"are you okay?" chanhee snapped out of it, realising that they were already standing right in front of the restaurant, the waitress ready to bring them to their seats. "your eyebrows are furrowed," changmin said, frowning slightly and lightly trying to push chanhee's eyebrows up again. "are you thinking of sad things?"

chanhee shook his head, gently swatting changmin's hand away as they made their way inside the restaurant, changmin softly saying thanks to the waitress before sitting down while chanhee felt his entire body tense at the sight of some familiar faces, their smiles turning into looks of judgement the second they saw him together with changmin.

chanhee stared blankly at the menu, all the words seemingly fading into one big blur as he became keenly aware of how some of his fellow math majors were sitting at the table nearby, a problem that chanhee hadn't taken into account when he chose a place near their university. instinctively, he held onto the collar of his jacket, rubbing the red rose pin between his fingers as he tried to force his focus back onto the words before him.

suddenly, he felt a light kick from under the table and looking up, he saw changmin looking at him with wide eyes. "are they from your department?" changmin mouthed, tilting his head slightly towards the group of five sitting near them who now were trying their best to not make it seem as though they were observing the dinner between their major's top scorer and the dancer. "we can always go somewhere else," changmin mouthed again, emphasising every syllable so that chanhee could understand him clearly.

but before chanhee could reply, one of his classmates who he recognised was supposed to be a part of his group project approached them, her arms folded as the other four egged her on to disturb them.

"hi chanhee! i didn't know you were friends with this guy," she said, glaring at changmin before averting her gaze back onto chanhee. "why would you even associate yourself with him anyways chanhee? if you want, you could always join us instead!"

"that 'guy' has a name — it's ji changmin. i thought everyone in campus knows that," chanhee replied, trying to maintain his composure under the stares of more people who had begun looking at this sudden confrontation occurring. "are you so bored with your life that you've decided to interrupt a peaceful dinner?"

his classmate opened her mouth to speak but before she could, chanhee continued. "besides your failing grades, it seems that you've also failed to understand what proper etiquette means by disturbing people in a public setting like this." chanhee averted his gaze to the other four behind her, using her as a shield to hide their own embarrassment. "you all should learn to mind your own business. if you gossiped less, professor might actually give you guys a passing grade-"

"well, we aren't the ones going on dates with a useless dance major who won't achieve anyth-" without a second thought, chanhee splashed her with water, some people audibly reacting to the scene as a waitress came over to try and calm everyone down.

changmin stood up and got inbetween chanhee and the girl before anything else could happen. "i-i'll pay for the disturbance," changmin said, the waitress nodding as he handed her a few bills. "let's go chanhee."

once they were outside and far out of sight of the people who knew chanhee, said boy lowered his mask, a sudden panic overwhelming him and causing him to tremble as he sat down on the pavement and hugged his legs to himself.

his facade of sarcasm and what others deemed as rude always wore off fast, panic almost immediately kicking in after he spoke his mind.

beside him, he felt a presence slowly coming closer and once chnagmin was sat down as well, he couldn't help but apologise. "sorry i ruined dinner when i was the one who suggested it in the first place. i must've crushed your hopes and if anything, this is more reason to despise me because who suggests shit and immediately causes it to fail?"

he looked down onto the concrete ground, anticipating changmin's heated response. he expected any sort of disappointment or disgust in his inability to control his feelings but instead, he felt a soft touch on his hand and when he looked up, he saw the penguin keychain he had given changmin.

"little nyu wouldn't like seeing big nyu sad so-" changmin brought the keychain up to chanhee's face and with his thumb, he wiped away the tears that had fallen from chanhee's eyes. "-don't beat yourself up too much chanhee," changmin said, bringing the penguin to chanhee's cheek and making it give him a soft tap that signified a kiss.

changmin then proceeded to put the penguin on his own shoulder and offered a gentle smile to chanhee. "little nyu and i think you shouldn't apologise for things out of your control," changmin whispered.

"you carry that around?"

"you gave him to me to take care of so of course i'll bring him with me at all times," changmin replied, making the penguin do a small salute towards chanhee which made the boy smile slightly.

"thank you ji changmin," chanhee muttered, wiping his own tears away as he gave the little penguin a pat on the head.

changmin tilted his head slightly. "what are you thanking me for?"

"for taking care of nyu and not leaving him behind," chanhee said, reaching for changmin's head and giving him a pat too. "nyu appreciates you a lot."

and after a sigh and another round of wiping his tears away, chanhee spoke again.

"i appreciate you a lot ji changmin."

ᵕ̈♡˳೫˚∗

author's note:

little nyu, big nyu
how are we feeling about this?