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Although I left a sensitive content warning in the Author's Note, let me repeat:
If you are easily triggered by homophobia/cursing/LGBTQ+ shaming, please, do not read this chapter for your own mental well-being. My story is not worth your negative thoughts.
If you wish to know its contents, I can briefly tell what happens via a pm.
I'm sending you my support and lots of hugs.
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- Don't you know you're a f*ggot?
- ...
- ...
15-years old Bakugou was not ready for this hit.
One word made him feel like he was punched in his stomach. Tight knot started growing in his chest. He knew there was no point lying to his older self who felt exactly the same emotions. Yes, it's true, he might have a tiny tiny crush on his best friend but he had never put a label on it, never had to, the innocent, sweet boy he was. He had never kissed anyone, never watched adult stuff (still getting flustered at a mention of an adult word starting with 'p'), and he was already labelled as ... as something bad. Something dirty. And he did not like this feeling at all.
He wanted to punch his older self in the face but as he understood from the bike man's words, he could feel the pain too, being Katsuki's extension. No punching, no biting, no killing one another. He could scream some meaningless obscenities, eventually, his most trustworthy weapon against a cruel world that he developed over the years, but this time no words came to his mind. He felt empty. And dirty. So he was dirty. Is this why he's living in a shithouse? Because he's... dirty?
- I'm n-not, y-you are... - did his voice just tremble?!
- Hell, you know it. - Katsuki laid down on a sofa, hiding his head with an old, plain pillow that reeked of alcohol, smoke and something else. - The worst kind of human. The worst kind of a son. The worst kind of a hero. The dirty one...
Katsuki smiled lazily at his own words. Since realising his orientation at later stage of his teenage years, he has never had a problem with being homosexual. He has always been accepting of others, always openly answering any questions regarding his love interest. He had had a crush on Kirishima since he was 15, until he was around 17 when Kirishima confessed his feelings, which came as a surprise, after all problems Katsuki kept bringing to their friendship. As if he wanted to auto sabotage his own romantic feelings. As if he didn't feel worthy. Yet it worked somehow, until the point it just... stopped working.
At that point of his high school life, Katsuki was happy, and so were the people around him. Most of them, at least. It took him over a year to officially present Kirishima to his parents. Both boys were around 18, young, aspiring, ready to conquer the world and very much in love.
Katsuki recalled the day he invited Kiri to a family dinner at his place. He was nervous but confident, fully trusting his old shitty parents. Verbal and physical abuse and passive aggression excluded, his parents were pretty cool, after all. What could wrong with presenting dear Kiri as love of his life?
Apparently, one of them was not ready for that.
Katsuki pinched the top of his nose at a reminder of just a couple of Mitsuki's words that, wanting or not, engraved themselves in his sensitive heart forever.
(- Just what do you think you're doing?! Put your shit together, for god's sake, you're an adult now, time to find yourself a job, a wife, and stop being a fucking joke! You think I like when you're joking around like that? What do you mean you're not joking? Of course you are! Now drop the act, before I actually believe you and your stupid crap! And kick this sorry of a gay ass from my house!
- You fucking f*g, leave my house before I call the police! What do you mean you have nowhere to go?! Sell your dirty ass in the whorehouse for all I care! That's how you f*gs do money, isn't it?! What? YOU wanna be a hero?! Like anyone wants to be saved by someone like you, god damn it! I'd rather die from a fucking villain than get help from you! You 're gonna save me with one hand and pass me HIV with another!
- An invitation to what?! A wedding?! Last time I checked, a wedding was a union of a woman and a man, not of a fucking dirty joke you are! Now, leave my porch before I lose my shit!
- Take out your dirty ass from here! This is fucking hospital, no one wants to get infected by your gayness! What do you mean you want to talk to 'dad'?! Don't you even call my husband that again! Do you think I don't know it's your fault he's here in the first place?! You did this to your own father! You got your own father killed! Don't you ever dare calling my husband your 'dad'!
- What are you doing here, you dirty f*g?! No one wants you here, he doesn't want you here! You killed him, do you hear that?! YOU KILLED YOUR FATHER! Leave the church and don't you even dare dragging your dirty ass full of dicks to the cemetery! If I see you once around his grave, once, I swear I'm gonna make them kick you out! You're gonna pay for what you've done to my husband!)
...
'What's in the past, stays in the past' - Katsuki thought, swallowing gulp in his throat. There's no way he could elaborate on this topic to his younger version. If there's one thing he can do right in his life, he's going to save his young self from all the pain he had to endure up to this point. Talking about self-love. 'Is this why I got dad killed in the first place? Because I loved myself more than others? Is this a bad thing to do, to want a happy life? What did I do wrong?'
...
- The hell you're smiling at, uh?! - Bakugou snapped from the heavy silence that surrounded them both. He still couldn't connect the dots of his tiny innocent crush on his friend with the fact that his mum didn't want to talk to him. Not because he is stupid, he's far from that. It only hurt too much to think about that, to try to imagine his mum, his smiley, ballsy, explosive old hag as someone who could reject her only son. She'd been his number one fan, she couldn't do anything bad to her little Katsu-chan, maybe excluding a little punch or tantrum here and there but that served him right because it was always his fault. She couldn't reject him! She couldn't leave him alone! Could she?
Bakugou didn't need to ask this question out loud. He knew himself well enough to understand what lying curled up with his head under a pillow meant. 27-years old Katsuki seemed to have kept the same coping habit over the years.
The 15-years old had yet to discover all new habits added to the pot, like alcohol, cigarettes, one-night stands, and a shadow of the one that ripped two hearts at once, the worst of all - abuse.
One thing is certain, this sensitive teenager was not ready for that.
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27 And Counting (Adult Katsuki Bakugou MHA)
Fanfiction27-years old Katsuki Bakugou has come a long way since the beginning of his path toward the Number One Hero. However, he's not exactly where he thought he would be. He learns in a hard way that being hero isn't only about exploding villains' faces...
