suicidal pop star | eren x reader (modern AU)

chapter 39

"Y/n, I missed you," Eren smiled as he wrapped his arms around you.

"I missed you too, Eren," You replied, drowning in his arms. The two of you stayed like that for a while, listening to the rain hit the roof as you laid in bed.

You squinted your eyes as the sun hit your face, waking you up. Another dream about him. You sighed, getting out of bed and getting ready.

Last night, you and your friends went out for your birthday, but it wasn't anything special. You didn't really remember much, since you got drunk so early.

"Happy birthday y/n!" Jay yelled, popping open a bottle of champagne.

"Happy birthday!" Everyone else yelled. You giggled as you took a sip of the champagne, feeling your throat burn. Jay lined up more shots of alcohol and you downed them all, burning your throat even further. But it was needed, since you were trying to forget about the gift he sent you earlier that day.

"Shit, y/n. Don't drink too much so fast," Jay chuckled as he took your 6th empty shot glass out of your hand. He placed his hand on the small of your back and guided you to a table, helping you sit down as he sat next to you. You watched your sister and her girlfriend on the dance floor and smiled.

After several more drinks, you started feeling light-headed. You turned to Sasha and Niccolo, seeing their hands around each other and watched them dance as much as they could.

"If only he didn't cheat," You dryly chuckled, your head feeling fuzzy.

"Y/n, what? If you're talking about that douchebag, don't. He's not worth it. It's been two years," Jay's smile faded as he started to lecture you like always. "You have better people in your life. You need to get over him. This isn't healthy," He sighed as he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear.

"Like you?" You asked, turning to him.

"What?" He raised his eyebrow.

"Are you a better person in my life?" Your words slurred, but Jay was able to understand.

"I hope I am," He nervously chuckled.

"You think you could treat me better than he did?" You frowned, resting your forehead on his chest.

"Oh, y/n. I'm so glad you'll forget this tomorrow," He whispered. He lifted your head up and his caramel eyes met yours. "You're so beautiful," He whispered again as he leaned in and planted his lips upon yours. He kissed you softly and without thinking, you kissed him back. His hand held your cheek as the other was on your back, pulling you closer to him.

He pulled back, looking into your eyes again. "I'm sorry, fuck," Jay muttered. "I shouldn't have done that," He covered his mouth. You sat there dumbfounded, still not being able to process what happened.

"It's okay," You gave him a half-smile. "I'll forget about it tomorrow. Now let's go dance," You stood up, taking his hand and dragging him to the dance floor. You danced as the music played, making Jay dance with you too, and eventually, you forgot about the kiss.

No you didn't. You remembered everything. "Fuck," You muttered as you looked in the mirror, tracing a finger over your lips. After Eren, you've never been with another person, but you knew that Jay would be the first one.

You needed to call him and clear things up. You had no feelings for Jay. At all. Any love in your heart was still for Eren. And that hurt.

You picked up the phone and dialed Jay's number. After a few rings, he answered. "Hey, y/n? What's up?"

"Hi, Jay. We need to talk about last night," You said, sitting down on your couch.

"Fuck, I thought you'd forget. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"You apologized already. It's okay," You interrupted him. "But just to be clear, there are no romantic feelings between you and I, right?"

"... Yeah, of course. No feelings," He responded, making you relieved. A romance blooming between you and your best friend was not needed right now.

"Great, glad we are on the same page," You smiled. "I'll talk to you later," You said, hanging up the call.

After scrolling through Twitter and thanking your fans for the birthday wishes, you headed out to your favorite breakfast place to eat.

Upon reaching there, you felt a familiar presence around you. As you turned around in your seat, you were met with a bun of brown hair. The person turned around as well, making a pair of the most beautiful sea green eyes meet yours.

Memories come flashing back of the days you would stare into those eyes for what seemed like eternity, and your heart started to hurt.

"Eren," You said without thinking.

"Y/n," Eren whispered. "Um, how are you?" He asked nervously.

"I'm doing fine," You replied. "You?" Speaking of Eren, you didn't hear much about him anymore. He didn't release an album for over two years.

"I'm doing okay. Um, did you like the gift?" He scratched his neck awkwardly, looking away.

"Oh, uh, yeah, it was nice. Thanks," You nod.

"Oh, you're welcome. By the-"

"Sorry, I have to go," You quickly say, running out of the restaurant. Seeing Eren was not good for you. Maybe cutting him off was rude, but it was well deserved.

You got in your car and let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. A lot of things happened in the span of a short time, and you needed to calm down.

You drove home and on the way, you picked up some breakfast to eat. After arriving at home, you laid in your bed and contemplated.

There were so many things that you still needed to figure out. When you'll start writing again, how you'll get over Eren, finishing college, it was overwhelming.

After a few hours, your phone started to ring. It was Historia. You answered it, and before you could speak, Historia yelled, bursting into tears as she said "Y/n, look at the news,"

You were confused and wanted to ask why she was crying, but you quickly fiddled with the tv remote and switched the channel to the news.

The phone hit the floor as you read the words across the screen. Tears started pouring from your eyes as you fell to your knees, unable to think. Your heart had been shattered yet again.

"The famous pop star, Eren Jaeger, has been found dead in his apartment a few hours ago. Cause of death has been determined to be suicide." The reporter says on the TV.