Loki Misses the Asgardian Prison System

Chapter 1

Prison in Asgard is a joke.

Well, okay, that's not quite fair. Prison in Asgard isn't inherently a joke. Sometimes it works very well! Some prisoners have stayed in their cells for hundreds of years, so it's not the prisons' fault at all.

No, the problem is that Loki made them a joke. He got bored and decided he just wanted to sneak out.

Over.

And over.

And over.

Until finally, Odin gave up. The prisons of Asgard couldn't hold him, and though Loki thought sneaking out to steal something good to eat every few days was funny, his pseudo-father insisted it set a bad example for the other prisoners. If Loki could leave whenever he wanted, who's to say the other prisoners wouldn't try, too?

Frigga still refused to let Odin have him executed, so Odin decided to send him to a new prison instead. Loki begged him not to — and he doesn't use the term "beg" lightly. He would do anything to stay here and face standard Asgardian justice. He would gladly sit in his cell and mope for the rest of his life as long as it meant he didn't have to go there.

But Odin had already made up his mind, which is why Thor is now dragging a chained-up Loki through the elevator doors of Stark Tower.

Tony Stark is, as expected, already here. He's busy doing god-only-knows-what with his back to the elevator, and, without turning around, just says, "I thought you weren't coming home until Tuesday."

Loki raises an eyebrow and looks up at Thor. Either his adoptive brother has been living a secret double life on Midgard, or Tony was expecting somebody else. Thor must have at least asked if Loki could stay here, right? He has to know they're coming. Doesn't he?

"Stark," Thor says.

Tony whips around at the sound of his voice, all the holographic projections he'd been staring at disappearing immediately. He looks between the two Asgardians for a moment, then immediately says, "No! Get him out of here!" He points at the elevator. "Leave!"

"Stark —" Thor tries again, but Tony cuts him off.

"I don't want anything to do with him," he says. "Unless you're here to ask me to blow his face off, I want him gone."

"Oh, please don't," Loki says with a mocking smile. "I'm actually rather fond of my face."

Tony crosses his arms and looks up at Thor. "You said you would take care of him."

"We tried," Thor says. "We put him in prison — many times, actually. He would walk out when he was bored."

Tony scoffs. "He just walked out of prison?"

"Yes," Thor says.

"Oh, my god." Tony pinches the bridge of his nose. "Okay, so why is he here?"

"We needed to bring him somewhere that he couldn't escape," Thor explains. "So we decided to bring him here. My father has put an enchantment on the building. Loki cannot leave unless my father removes the spell."

"Why couldn't he just put a spell on the prison?" Tony asks, exasperated.

"He did," Thor says. "But with the prisons residing just under the palace, Loki was able to... Well, it didn't work."

Loki bites back a laugh. No, it really did not. In his defense, though, with his captor just a few floors above him, he couldn't not play a few tricks with all of his newfound spare time.

"Then find somewhere else to leave him!" Tony says. "He's not staying here!"

"Unfortunately, you have as little choice in this as I do," Loki tells him.

"You're not living in my house!" Tony yells, practically vibrating from frustration. It brings a small smile to Loki's face to see him this worked up over it.

"I will return periodically to ensure he isn't causing any problems," Thor continues.

"His existence is a problem!" Tony says.

"I appreciate this very much," Thor tells him. He begins to take off Loki's handcuffs, so Loki uses his magic to remove all his constraints. Thor is completely unphased, just scooping them up in one arm, Mjolnir still in the other. "You're a good man, Stark."

"You're not leaving him here!" Tony insists. "God, how many times do I have to say it?"

"Try it again," Loki says. "Maybe this will be the time he listens."

Tony grits his teeth. "Thor, you are taking your brother back to Asgard right now —"

"I will see you soon," Thor tells him with a smile. He gives a small wave with Mjolnir, then steps back into the elevator.

"Thor —" Tony runs over to the elevator, but the door closes just before he can get in. He groans and takes off down the stairs instead.

Loki clasps his hands in front of himself and waits for Tony to come back. It shouldn't take too long, he's sure. Thor will be gone before Stark even reaches the ground floor.

Loki walks over to the floor-length window, gazing out over the city. He will admit, objectively, it's a better view without the Chitauri invading, though it was far more satisfying to look out and see them soaring through the skies. Although he can't see the ground beneath him, he would recognize the sight of the Bifrost anywhere, and he can pinpoint the exact moment Thor leaves the realm.

With Thor gone, there's nothing else for him to look for outside, but there's nothing to look at inside, either, so he keeps his gaze on the city until he hears the ding of the elevator again. He turns around, a sarcastic remark on the tip of his tongue, only to see Tony marching out of the elevator with an iron-gloved hand raised. He shoots out a blast of energy, and Loki flies right into the window, the glass shattering under the force.

It seems the Allfather really has already put the spell in place, because Loki falls straight down to the floor, no part of him leaving the tower. It's almost as if there were an invisible wall right behind the window.

Loki looks up at him from the pile of glass shards he now lies in. "Ow."

Tony drops his hand to his side, the metal folding away. He looks down at the god with a frown, and, after a long few moments, just says, "So, you want a bedroom, or...?"

Loki gives a small shrug. "That would be nice."