Loki Misses the Asgardian Prison System

Chapter 91

"I don't know if I want to go in there. This door's worth more than my house."

Steve chuckles, clapping his friend on the back. "Come on, it'll be fine."

Sam scoffs. "Man, if I break something, I'm never gonna be able to pay it off."

"We'll make Tony pay for it," Steve says, leading him into the building. "We do it with the groceries; when we want new movies; Nat just made him buy a new bean bag chair for her room last month; he pays for the cat food—"

"You guys have a cat?" Sam interrupts.

"Oh, yeah, we have a cat," Steve says. He forgot to mention her when he was listing off the residents of the building — and yet he included Pepper, Rhodey, and Jane, despite them only coming by once in a blue moon. Oops. "Loki shares her with Tony's girlfriend."

Sam stares at him. "Loki has a cat?"

"Yeah, Loki has a cat," Steve says. "Her name's Snowflake. I think she's two years old now?" She was one year old last New Years, right? So she'd be two now? He has no idea. He pays far more attention to Loki than he does to Loki's cat.

"Wow," Sam says. "Everything I learn about this guy is against my own will."

Steve sighs. Yeah, that probably sounds weird. "He's really not that bad," he says. "I know it sounds like he would be—"

"Hey, man, it's cool," Sam assures him. "If you trust him, I trust him. I'm not gonna argue with Captain America on morality."

That puts a small smile on his face. That's nice. One less thing he has to worry about. "Sometimes he can be a little much," Steve warns hin. "If he tries acting all threatening, you can humor him if you want, but don't believe a word he says. He's just being..." Well, he's being him.

"It's a dick-measuring contest," Sam substitutes. "Yeah, I get it. I know the type."

"Yeah, pretty much," Steve says. It's one thing he and Tony have in common, but if he said it aloud, he'd definitely end up with either a knife to the back or an Iron Man-sponsored blast to the chest — or both.

"So, who am I gonna meet today?" Sam asks as they step into the elevator.

"No idea," Steve says. "Loki's either in his room, the kitchen, or watching TV; Stark and Banner are probably in their labs but they'll come out eventually; Nat's in DC and Clint might've gone with her, I'm not sure; and Thor comes in and out, so you never know when he's gonna be here."

Sam raises his brows. "You got everyone's business memorized like that?"

"Well, when you live with them for as long as I have..." Steve shrugs. Yeah, he pays attention. He knows their business and he's sure they know his. That's just how it is.

"Huh," Sam says. "Well, hey, whatever works."

They don't find anybody when they step out of the elevator. That's not too surprising; people don't spend too much time there. Steve's next bet is the kitchen. There's usually somebody eating something at all times. But when they reach the kitchen, they're greeted with nothing but dirty dishes piling up in the sink.

Great.

He'll take care of that later.

"Want to check out the man cave?" Steve asks. They might find somebody in there, and if not, at least it's a comfortable room to hang out in.

Sam snorts. "You guys have a man cave?"

Steve sighs. He's gotten so used to calling it that, he forgot how ridiculous it sounds. "Yeah, Tony named it. We thought it was stupid, too."