Loki Misses the Asgardian Prison System

Chapter 145

"Time is taking its sweet time erasing you. And you've got your demons, and darling, they all look like me..."

Loki mumbles the lyrics absentmindedly as he gazes out the open window, enjoying the slight breeze and the stars from the comfort of his own bed. That's one of the nice things about having a bedroom so far removed from everyone else: he can bask in the serenity of crickets chirping and leaves rustling, or he can sing along to his Taylor Swift CDs without anyone overhearing him. This truly is the height of luxury.

It occurs to him that his idea of luxury has changed a lot since his princely days.

Still, he's enjoying this. He never paid much attention to the little things like this when he was in Asgard, but recently, he's come to appreciate life's simple joys. He has Taylor Swift to thank for that.

There's a knock on his door — Thor, he assumes. He's been off in Asgard all day. He must be here to tell Loki that he's back. Or maybe it's Steve? Though it seems a little late for a visit from him. He's definitely betting on Thor.

He swings his legs over the edge of his mattress and sits up. With a tinge of magic, the door opens itself.

And Wanda Maximoff is in the doorway, her hands clasped behind her back as she looks at him timidly.

Loki's expression darkens. "What?"

Wanda takes that as an invitation to come into the room, but she doesn't stray all too far from the door. She takes a deep breath, then says, "I'm sorry."

Loki cocks an eyebrow, silent.

"Nobody has ever done that to me before," she says. "I could not have imagined it would feel like that. And I think what I did to you was worse than what you did to me. So I'm sorry."

"Okay."

Wanda just looks at him for a short while, until she finally seems to realize he's not going to say anything else. Then she speaks again. "What is it you saw in my head?"

"Could you not see it as well?" Loki asks. He'd always assumed...

"I could," she says. "But it meant nothing to me. What did you see that I did not?"

Loki sighs. She's like a child – and not the fun kind. Not the Harley kind. She's naive, uninformed about the world she's now a part of, and he doesn't have the patience for it.

"It doesn't matter what you saw," he says. "It was what you felt. I could feel the Mind Stone's power flooding through your body, and I could feel when it stopped. It unlocked your powers; it does not control them."

She cocks her head to the side. "How do you know that?"

"I just told you."

"How do you know?" she asks again. "How could you feel that? I couldn't."

"I've studied magic a thousand years longer than you've been alive," Loki says. "I understand its intricacies in a way you could never dream of."

"You've studied it," she repeats thoughtfully. "With books? Or...?"

"In part," he says, "but I had a wonderful teacher. A book alone will do you no good."

Wanda's silent for a moment, pondering that; then, "Teach me."

Loki scoffs. "I beg your pardon?"

"Teach me about my powers," she says. "I want to understand them like to do."

"You can't."

"Why not?"

"Because you can't."

"I don't believe that," she says. "If I was not meant to understand my powers, I would not have them. The Mind Stone would have killed me and Pietro like it did everyone else who tried to touch it."

"Then you'll have to figure it out alone," Loki says monotonously. This is so very much not his problem.

"I don't know how," she says. "I can't even control it. I hear people's thoughts whether I want to or not, and I want to understand why. I want to make it stop."

Loki juts his jaw forward, frustrated. This is ridiculous. "Sit down."

She furrows her brows. "I'm sorry?"

"Sit," he repeats. "On the floor. Sit down."

That doesn't seem to clear up her confusion whatsoever, but she does as she's told, lowering herself to the floor and crossing her legs in front of her. She's so tense — a little nervous, maybe. He's not really explaining himself, but he doesn't owe her an explanation. She should consider herself lucky he's even offering his help.

"Relax."

"I am relaxed."

"No, you're not," he says impatiently. "You're stiff. I can see the tension you hold. You need to relax."

Wanda does her best, but her best isn't necessarily all that great.

"Don't slouch," he says. "Just relax."

Wanda straightens up a little, but she does look a little less stiff now. It's an improvement, albeit not much of one.

"Close your eyes," he says.

"Why?"

"Because you asked for my help, and this is what you get."

Wanda frowns, but she does close her eyes. Loki waits a moment just to make sure she's not about to open them before he does the same. He'll have a much easier time guiding her through this if he's doing it himself.

"Now clear your mind," he says.

"How?"

Loki fights back a groan. Does that really need an explanation? Just stop thinking. It's easy.

... Or maybe he just feels like it's easy because he's been doing this for centuries. He's not sure.

He can't remember how he first learned to meditate. It was from Frigga, of course; that much is obvious. But the actual memories of the day itself are long gone. He doesn't know how she put up with his ignorance, but she must have been much more patient than he is now.

"Focus on your breathing," he says. That's probably a good place to start. "In and out. Don't think about anything else: just your breathing."

He has no way of knowing if Wanda really does that, but he assumes she does. He does the same. He empties his head, clearing his mind of any earthly worries.

"Focus your energy inwards," he says. "Forget everything around you. There is nothing here but you."

He himself takes a deep breath and does his best to heed his own advice, though he'll admit that it's hard to focus on himself when he knows that Wanda is sitting on the floor in front of him.

"Can you feel it?" he asks. "Can you feel the power surging through you?"

"I don't... think so?"

Loki runs a hand down his face, exasperated. He is definitely not going to find this tranquility right now. He opens his eyes, and Wanda hasn't moved a muscle, still seated on the ground with her eyes closed. She's trying, at least. She's bad at it, but she sure seems to be trying. "Focus," he says.

"I am focused."

"If you were focused, you would know," Loki deadpans.

Wanda scowls, but she does her best. Her face relaxes, and, little by little, so does the rest of her. Her breathing slows, and there's a lightness about her that wasn't there before.

It's going to take more than one evening to teach her to control her powers, but it feels like they're off to a good start.