•STOCKHOLM SYNDROME• [obx3]

Chapter 40: Sick boy

Disclaimer: suicidal references

A heart monitor beeps in the background. He can hear his breath echo from the mask pressed over his mouth.

Aaa shit... I'm still here.

'He's awake', chimes a sickly sweet feminine voice, probably one of the nurses.

Rafe forces his heavy eyes open. Thats when he sees her. She stands, a few feet away, frozen in place. He looks away, irritated by the pity her teary eyes carry.

Though his bodys still numb from the anesthetic, he forces himself upright. A grunt escapes his lips. His hand roams over his stomach as it twists and lurches. Rafe tears the mask off himself. He holds the back of his wrist against his mouth, gagging. Just in time, the nurse hands him a sick bag.

Rafe chokes out into it, spitting out the bitter taste of the pills. His throat burns with a heated sensation of old liquor. He topples over to the bin and trashes it. The nurses demands he get back to bed. But after repeatedly being ignored, she shakes her head and leaves the room.

Rafe walks past Kie not looking at her, his lips form a thin line, emotionless. But before he reaches the door, she steps out in front of him. Her bawled fist, banging weakly at his chest

'Don't- Don't ever do that again', She cries, then pulls him close, into a tight hug.

Rafe eyes gaze her over shoulder, staring distantly. 'Get off me', he says lowly.

His arms are raised, not hugging her back. At once, he stops feeling numb. Everything comes back. All the feelings. Everything.

'I said, get the fuck off me', Rafe shoves her away.

Kie stumbles backwards, gazing at him with red eyes. 

'Why are you here huh?', Rafe slurs. 'Just ...go', he shakes her away with the flicking motion of his wrist. 

But she makes no move to leave. Instead, her eyes rise from the ground meeting his.

'I care about you'

He chuckles lowly, his tongue coating his tooth as he nods his head mockingly. This must all be some sick joke. No one cares. 'Why?', he spits.

'Rafe... You're worth caring for'

Rafe laughs dryly, he walks away, leaving the room and heading down the hospitals corridor. What makes her think she can come back here and fuck around with me like this.

She doesn't care. No one does. Sometimes they pretend they do. But they can't fool me anymore.

My dad acted like he cared. And for the longest time I fell for his act. It took me until last night to realise it. I was high, higher than I've even been but nothing I did drew my thoughts away.

Instead, the coke brought back all the memories. Not that I lost them, but everything seemed to be covered in a thick fog, like all this time I've been trying to avoid it. My mind relapsed over everything.

Dad acted like he cared but it's obvious he never did. He was never there for me. I might've fucked up with Barry but that night, but my dad left me.

One stuff up was off it took for him to abandon me. After everything I've done for him. He left me with nothing, he kicked me out and made it look easy.

I should've known he didn't care about me. He never did. Sarah was always his top priority. I was always second best. I fucked myself over to compete for his attention like some kind of dog. But he never gave me anything.