{request for: juptersmoons <33}
y/n loved the simple things in life.
the gentle breezes that warmed her face,
the slow blossoms of the flowers,
the harmonies of raindrops against the gravel,
the twinkling of the stars above.
she was a woman who cherished the little pleasures of life.
i longed to be that way once.
i was too consumed in finding something greater and better than what was before me,
yet she walked and smiled with an elegance that could never be copied.
y/n was the kind of woman artists spend centuries trying to translate her exotic beauty onto a canvas.
from the glimmers in her eyes to the angel kisses that littered her body.
it was impossible to recreate.
and every time i'm reminded of her,
i feel the chills corrupt my skin as though she is here with me again.
i loved her with everything i had to offer.
i swear at times,
i can still feel the inscription of her name in my bones.
they ache when i pass by a field of blooming flowers or see the full moon.
the first time i saw y/n l/n,
it was the age of famine, disease, and loss.
i had just been turned by carlisle a mere months earlier,
so the senses i adopted were still adjusting to the business of chicago in nineteen-eighteen.
i could smell the bitterness, sickly blood in the air.
it often made my head throb.
which is why i hardly left the apartment carlisle and i were confined to unless it was absolutely necessary.
the day i saw her happened to be one of those days.
i had been in the market,
listening to the cries of the sick and beggars,
when i acquired the items i'd been sent out for,
i went to hurry home.
but there she was.
a rag was shielding her nose and mouth from the infecting influenza,
but i could still see the genuine beauty in every part of her.
i nearly fell to my knees and whispered a prayer to the sure goddess before me.
i knew then that my life had been changed entirely.
whatever i had been headed for was no longer.
my main focus became y/n l/n and all it took was that once, single glance.
to my dismay and overbearing thoughts,
i felt as though i had no choice but to pursue y/n and all her day-to-day adventures to be sure of her safety.
with beauty so indescribable and desired,
i had no good faith in this city.
i had to be there at every second in case she ever needed me.
and if i was being entirely honest,
she fascinated me.
she was too ethereal to simply exist amongst the boring.
a part of me wondered and begged to know if perhaps maybe she was somehow supernatural in the same way i am.
but throughout the ventures i took to with her,
i realized y/n was as every bit human as the next.
she just possessed a ravishing smile,
darling eyes,
and perfect skin.
i am not the first and surely not the last to believe her ethereal existence is a blessing from the gods.
the way she illuminated in the presence of her friends and family made my cold blood run warm.
though it was a phantom rush of blush,
i felt it all the same.
i watched in a suave manner as y/n bounced her way up the steps and into her friends home.
it was a relaxing sigh to see her find company worth settling in.
from all that i'd been able to see,
y/n's family only consisted of a single brother.
and often times,
they didn't seem to get along.
y/n never argued or raised her voice,
she simply etched her eyebrows in a demanding silence.
much like her brother,
when i saw this look i fell quiet.
perhaps the straining family history is what added to her mysterious presence.
i was desperate to find out every detail possible.
one day,
i'd find the courage to speak to her.
one day soon.
"it's awfully cold,"
y/n would say,
rubbing the palms against her arms to create warm friction.
i wished now more than ever,
that i could whisk her away in my arms and warm her until she were covered in crimson.
i saw her in the window,
closing the curtains to keep the draft in,
and i could have sworn her eyes locked with mine.
they must have.
listen to the rushing of the wind in my lungs.
watch the pupils in my eyes dilate.
if my heart could whisper worthy words,
her name would be its prayer.
i lean back against the tree behind me and try to recall the last time i felt such a rush of fervor.
y/n was lighting something new inside of me.
and i'd do anything to keep her around.
finally,
the night drew to an end and y/n stepped out of the house and was well on her way home.
i noticed a glossy film in her eyes along with the staining of her lips and realized she must've had a drink or two.
i adored her drunkly giggles and swell of affection.
what i would do to taste the wine on her lips myself.
i shake these thoughts from my head and begin to cut through the alley,
making sure her travel home is perfectly safe.
i put distance between us.
i won't trail her like a bloodthirsty stalker,
i won't breathe down her back in a promise of protection.
i'm far enough away to keep her comfortable,
but nearby incase she needs me.
and god forbid she ever need me.
"wow. she's beautiful."
the thought,
though it does not belong to me,
enters my mind and leaves me wondering.
this is no foreign thought.
everyone thinks it when they see her pass.
and when y/n catches them staring and waves with a genial smile,
their thoughts are only doubled in likeliness.
but this thought...
it's sick.
it's lingering with a sense of obsession.
i look around for the source of the thought,
balling my fists in the process to unleash whatever rage is fueling inside of me,
but i come up empty.
their thoughts torture me.
they continue speaking of y/n's harm and her demise and i'm rendered useless.
it's too dark for me to seek out anything other than silhouettes.
but y/n;
i'm searching for her.
when i finally find her up ahead,
i reach out to bring her into the protection of my arms,
but i am too late.
my worst nightmare has come to fruition.
it's directly in front of me.
i see the flash of light before i hear it.
the gunshot enters y/n's abdomen and she falls.
i'm torn between chasing down the scum who would ever lay a foul hand to this precious being and wanting to kneel beside y/n and weep for this misfortune;
weep because i failed.
i decide y/n is more important,
so i take her into my arms and hold her as tightly as i can without shattering her fragile bones.
blood,
her sweet, enticing blood,
enters into my lungs.
the air is thick with the metallic scent;
it coats my tongue in an alluring way.
i swallow hard and press my cold lips to her forehead.
i can feel the warmth slipping from her body.
"i'm sorry. i'm so sorry,"
i whisper with a hoarse voice.
my throat is coated in flames.
i could cry out if my pain for y/n's faltering life didn't trump any pain i might feel.
her eyelids are fluttering as though she refuses to close them.
her breathing is shallow and still,
she is smiling.
"who would do this to you?"
i ask myself more than asking y/n.
i don't know what to do.
my limbs are stuck and frozen.
yet somehow,
even in death,
she is graceful.
i'm ripped away from these loving thoughts by my primal urges.
i want nothing more than to sink my teeth into her soft, tender flesh and drink until my hearts content.
that's when it hits me.
i can save her.
i can hear her heartbeat slowing and i realize i'm strapped for time.
i readjust her body only to feel the sticky blood coat my arms.
shivers that i wish i wouldn't feel overcome me.
"i'm going to take away your pain now, o-okay? i can...i can save you,"
i promise rather naively.
i'm new to this life myself but yet,
i would risk my life in turn of y/n's.
"it's going to hurt a little,"
i begin to warn,
but she lifts a weak hand to my cheek and rests it there.
it's cold and only growing colder.
i notice her once fearful eyes are becoming replaced with a look of contentment.
then through heaving breaths,
she murmurs,
"i...i trust...you."
i sink my teeth into her and everything turns black.
i stare into bella's hardened eyes as i surface back to present day.
a saddened day where y/n is only a mere memory now.
there's nothing left for me to say.
i've explained a decade long grief that has not eased since.
"so..where is she?"
bella asks with a little more insensitivity than i expected.
"i don't...i don't know. a few years after her turning, she left to find a bigger part of herself."
i could remember hearing her gentle voice explaining the reasoning to me.
"i've lost my humanity, edward. i need to know who i am in this...this body. and i won't find it here, where my old self is still lingering."
all i could do was promise i'd be there for her should she ever wish to find me again.
even now,
i can feel her in my arms again when my eyes close.
she's there and her floral scent gathers in my lungs.
and if i focus hard enough,
i can still hear that melodic voice.
"i owe you everything, edward."
my eyes snap open and i wonder why her voice was suddenly so clear.
i'll always be able to hear traces of it,
but this felt different.
it was as if she was here.
right in front of me.
before i go too far into detail about my years of quietly searching for the faintest trace of her,
i return back to the topic of conversation.
"do you understand now? why i can't be with you? i haven't healed the hole in my heart that is y/n."
"i think you're waiting for her to come back to you. to find you again."
of course i was.
i'd wait another eternity if it meant having her back in my arms again.
i looked at my hand that currently held a golden ring of promise.
we'd find each other again.
i was sure of it.
"there's a flicker of hope inside of me i cannot smother, bella,"
i admit in an almost shameful tone.
but bella doesn't argue nor does she judge.
she nods her head in understanding then says,
"i hope she finds you again."
the wind blows and with it comes a familiarity of
y/n's caresses to my skin.
how light and gentle they were.
and how i long for them,
even after all this time.
i can see a look of convincing beginning in bella's eyes.
i'm not sure i have the energy to continue speaking of y/n,
especially to someone to adamant about changing my mind.
doesn't she understand?
y/n is the name that is carved into my bones.
"well, it's nice to see you're making friends."
i nearly fall to my knees in an exasperated action of relief.
that sweet, honeyed voice that once whispered the syllables of my name in a drawl of enamor is truly here in front of me.
my y/n.
she has found me again.
"oh,"
bella whispers in the same astonishment i, too, felt when i first saw y/n.
even now,
my limbs are trembling at her winsome sight.
"you're quite the curious type, aren't you?"
y/n asks with her eyes to bella.
i can hear the faint trace of sarcasm in her tone,
but bella is none the wiser.
to her,
it's a genuine question asked by the lips of some divine living.
y/n lays her nectar covered lips to my cheek and i swear a spasm of heat shoots throughout my body.
she stares into my eyes with the same amount of longing that is in mine and i'm reminded of the night we wedded;
how simple times had been.
i can see the ring i procured for her still lies on her finger and i'm comforted with a sense of bliss.
she has come back for me.
i watch in a fixed daze as y/n leans down to face bella,
their eyes interlocking for what's about to come.
through gentle whispers and demanding syllables,
y/n wills bella to forget about all she learned of supernatural, my life, and rids her of any burdens.
i watch,
still in shock by my lover's surprise appearance,
as bella's eyes fade into a look of forgetfulness.
she's piled into her car and gone before i can exhale another breath.
"you know,"
i begin while wrapping a yearning arm around y/n's waist and pulling her closer to me.
"she would have been okay knowing. there's not a love in this world that compares to yours."
"gives me some relief knowing my marriage won't be threatened,"
she purrs with a voice of silk.
"even after all this time?"
y/n asks while draping her arms around my neck.
i'm rather curious why she would ask a question so irrational.
it's then i realize that while it may have felt like decades for me,
it has been centuries for my dear y/n.
between finding herself and longing for our love,
time seems to have left tears in her heart.
i allow for my fingers to caress down her smooth cheek while i say the words,
"it will always be you, my love."
the words rush over her in a warm blanket of comfort.
she closes her eyes to bask in it,
all while i'm left to adore her in all the beauty she possesses.
finally,
the anticipation is over as our lips meet in the middle for a welcoming, loving kiss that i have prayed to indulge in again.
when her hands run themselves through my hair,
i feel a shiver of contentment run rampant through me.
the idea of forever seemed implausible to me at some point.
but with one glance to the prepossessing goddess
y/n is,
all of that quickly changed.
my forever lays in the rings of her colored eyes;
everything has worked out exactly the way it was meant to for this moment here.
how divine.
