left myself at home

chapter seventeen: so sick of seventeen

NOTE: EDIT OF THIS CHAPTER ON MY TIKTOK @GRACEFULLYFUCKED!

"COMING!" i yell as i frantically walk out of the side door of the school to kris's car at 7:02. i'm dressed in a white top with a sheer black one over it, followed by a tan striped skirt and a leather jacket. i make note of sofia's pastel yellow and blue outfit. she looks stunning as usual, so no surprise there.

"i still can't believe we're going." kris says as i plump in the back seat.

"technically we're going to lila's first, then the party." i joke in hopes to brighten the mood.

"it's whatever, i'll take whatever opportunity to dress cute." sofia adds, but she doesn't sound too excited.

i awkwardly ride in the back seat. it's pretty silent—the ride there. and finally we arrive to lilas brick estate; a townhouse off of newbury street. the sun has set and i see little kids running from door to door, now remembering it's halloween. the party never mentioned any costumes; so i think my empty outfit will still do.

"trick or treat!" kris jokes when lila opens the door.

"aw you're dressed as a clown! how cute!" she jokes back as we enter her beautiful front room. the high ceilings lead to a staircase where kayla comes running down to greet us.

"sorry i was grabbing my phone, everyone's in the living room right?" kayla asks as she lands on the front step.

"yeah, let's move." lila says while leading us to a grand living room. kyle and daniel lay on the couch with shea, lexi, and adhira. we join them while a disney halloween show echoes over us.

"okay snacks in the kitchen, let me know if you want water, drinks are club only." lila states once she settles into the living room. i find a place on her soft carpet next to kris who's next to sofia, while lila joins right beside me.

"your house is so cool." i try to make conversation.

"oh yeah, it's your first time here." daniel comments.

mhm.

"okay but you know what we should play?" lexi asks the group.
"never have i ever." she proposes.

the group cheers in agreement and we go around the group to begin the game.

"never have i ever...lost my virginity." daniel laughs with a smirk.

everyone makes a reaction and laughs while i notice daniel, kyle, lexi, shea, lila, all put their fingers down.

"ohhh shit!" kris laughs.

i quietly put my first finger down, sofia laughing saying "whattt?!?"

it's not uncommon for people my age to have sex, i just think sofia would have liked to hear the story.

after our laughter halts, kayla asks "never have i ever jumped off a cliff" with lila, daniel, kris and i putting our fingers down. i think back to my maldives field trip freshman year at that insane school in rome.

"never have i ever been skinny dipping"
"never have i ever fell out of a tree"
"never have i ever had a crush on a teacher"
"never have i ever fucked a teacher"
"never have i ever blacked out"
"never have i ever been crossed"

"never have i ever kept a secret." kyle says. and he's staring right at me.

"i think everyone's done that at some point." daniel comments.