Letters to You

~Off~

One thing I've always hated doing is turning my emotions off

but now it's all I will be able to do

I just wanna be happy

but I can't 

not yet

I can only hope to be with those who truly care soon

now all I can do is look in the mirror and say 
"It's okay, my dear it'll all be over" as I close my eyes picturing myself free smiling softly 

soon it'll all be reality  but for now I smile although It never reached my eyes as I knew deep down

faking It was all I could do as I said "it's all gonna go away, just..turn it off"