Memory loss, Anxiety and Depression. When you hear all three in a sentence you probably think of old, senile grandparents that are simply loosing the fight against ageing. Follow along with Brie, a 23 year old woman working her way through life with...
Somehow, as always, Ash has managed to turn my pitiful day into something else. In the past, I'd consider this to be quite fun. Spontaneous nights out, but that's not who I am anymore. It's sad, to know you were fun once upon a time, but now I wouldn't be seen anywhere near a pub if it wasn't for chuckles.
It's not that I don't like pubs, more so the social part of it. Most of the pubs, like the one I picked Chad up from the other night, were places I went to before.... 'Shit hit the fan' I could say. I know most of the staff and regulars, meaning they knew me. Knew me, is past tense, I'm not the same person I was....before.
Gritting my teeth, I just hope I don't see anyone I know, or at least they don't start asking me questions. Just give me my drink, so I can leave.
The doors open, Ash dragging me inside as one of the few songs that used to always be on in here starts to play. When it comes to my memory, songs will always be the winners of getting me to remember stuff. When I was young, my brothers would have to come up with random songs to get me to remember my homework, for example. For the life of me, I could never remember how 'Much' was spelt. I'd always end up putting a 'T' after the 'U', it took them three failed tests until they came up with a song, M.U.C.H, M.U.C.H, M.U.C.H, M.U.C.H, M.U.C.H! In the tune to the SpongeBob square pants theme song with the whole dance and everything.
I love this song. And I don't love a lot of things. I could count on one hand all the things I love. This song, Mumford, my brothers and well, I think that's it. I don't think it's worth loving stuff if you don't love the way they make you feel. Chad should be on that list, but I just can't let him up there, no matter how much it pains me.
Paradise city by guns n roses. What a song. That unmistakable guitar and drum opening that just makes me want to stand on the tables and sing at the top of my lungs. If I just had the balls.
'Ok, Brie, what will it be? What's your poison?' Bleach please. I shrug my shoulders, giving him an awkward smile, hoping he just orders anything for me to make this night go faster.
'Surprise me.' I've never been a big drinker. A shrink would probably dive deep down in my brain and gather evidence from my childhood to show why I don't drink. They'd probably say 'is it because you saw what alcohol did to your family? You blame alcohol?' And that most likely is the reason. That's how I came up with that answer right? But I also hate it for other reasons. Watching it steal my boyfriend from me when I needed him most.
Also it tastes like shit and gives me a headache.
'One pint of beer and one vodka and coke please.' Ash is leaning on the bar, probably chuffed with himself for even getting me to come out, never mind actually drinking. Slightly bobbing his head to the song. The bar man goes off to fetch our drinks and leaves us to chat in the mean time. Looking around the bar as you do, or at least I do, I have to do a double take to be sure. 'You have got to be fucking kidding me.' Ash looks around the room quickly, probably looking for Chad, no Ash. This is much worse. It's Harry.
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