The One That Got Away!

chapter 12

New years eve was short lived. It wasn't all that great, other than being by myself.
Jacob came by and helped me get high and well the high wasn't even a high anymore. The pain was still there, just made me feel numb. Like I can see everything going slow motion, just dragging.
When school started back up, I had slowly started winging myself off from doing drugs. But with Jacob, it was hard to do half the time.
Joey, saw me struggling with it. He saw me crashing when didn't want anyone to see me crash. One day at lunch, I felt weak and I could barely even move. Where I had almost passed out by my locker and if it wasn't for Joey being next to me, catching me.
Joey had drove me home and stayed with me and helped me for the rest of the night. He had told his parents that he was staying over with Chris and told Chris to help back him up. He didn't tell him he was with me, Chris didn't like that Joey was always staring at me. He says its creepy that his best friend is head over heels for baby sister but I didn't think or see Joey that way.
Or at least I thought so.
The past few weeks, I stayed home being "sick" and Joey had came over to help me. He done everything he could. Cooked, clean, took care of me and helped with my puppy. Walked her outside, fed her, washed her when she felt dirty, you name it.
I didn't want to do anything to be honest. I didn't even want to be alive. I felt like a very bad person for starting my young self off the wrong way. My mother, only if she was alive, would beat the living shit out of me. Maybe even kill me, matter of fact. And what I feel, I wanted to do just that.
I was alone, but I wouldn't be for long. It was almost 2:30 pm and I knew Joey would be here in about 5-15 minutes. So I went into bathroom and ran me a bath hot and while it was running, I had grabbed shaver and broke it to get the blade out.
Once I got it out, started to strip out of my clothes into just my underwear. I knew I shouldn't care if my clothes got wet but didn't care. I felt nothing.
I stepped into tub and saw it covered my whole body, so I turned it off. I laid back where it was at my neck. As I felt completely comfortable, I grabbed the blade and started at one wrist. At first I was scared but I shouldn't be. So I placed the point down first then went slow at first once I started I went a little faster. I done it 3 times and saw the blood come out. It wasn't pouring out fast but I knew, it was enough to get it going once it did. Then I done the same with the other wrist. Once I was done, I dropped the blade outside the tube and laid back and let my life slowly fade away.

Joey

It was little after 2 when I got home. I done my chores and my homework. My parents wasn't home yet. They were still at work, so I decided that I would go over to Chris's place and hang.
As I was driving to his place, I started thinking of Rosey. How she was starting to affect me in so many ways that I thought I never felt.
So at the last second, I done a quick u-turn and headed her way. Usually I do go over to her place around 3 but today I wanted to hang out with my best friend but today, I had this feeling that I needed to see her.
As I got to her place, I heard her puppy barking. Which was weird. So I hurried up and ran inside. When I heard her barking upstairs in the bedroom, I kinda felt off that something was wrong. So ran up the stairs and when I saw, her dog scratching at the bathroom door, I felt sick. I felt off that I was gonna see something that I didn't want to see but at this moment I didn't care. I opened the door and saw was in the tub bleeding from her wrist, almost under the water.
I ran to her and grabbed her out of the water and laid her on top of me grabbing towels to stop the bleeding. As I was doing so, I grabbed my phone and called 911.
It took them a few to get here but once they did, they took over and helped her.
I sat there tearing up that I lost her but one of the EMTs said they felt a pulse but it was weak. They rushed her out of the house, to the truck and rushed her to the hospital.
I grabbed my phone and called her step mom and told her what just happened.
When I told her, she freaked out and hung up the phone. After a few seconds, I got up and rushed out of the house as well. Not knowing if I could take it, if she dies on me.
And how I'm gonna explain how I felt once she comes out of this.