A Beast's Heart (english version)

39.

Exactly one letter lay open on Tywin's seat as his war council gathered. The lord was brought up to date, then he announced the contents of the parchment - Stannis Baratheon was about to attack the capital.
I walked around the table and poured water for everyone before taking the pile of unread letters to my corner and sorting through them with the help of the Book of the Houses of Westeros. As I did so, I kept squinting at the men at the table. Tywin seemed visibly restless. Kevan, who had turned out to be Tywin's brother, raised his voice.
"King's Landing will fall within the hour, once Stannis has landed there with his force. Still King Joffrey, Cersei and the court can ride west to safety."
Tywin sat in his seat with a grim expression on his face.
"And give up the Iron Throne?"
"Better than seeing their heads impaled on the city walls! Stannis will have them all executed!"
"No! A king who flees will not remain king for long! He is a Lannister, he will stand and fight!" the lion looked proudly at the table for a moment before continuing, his voice gaining bitterness, "Stannis is two days' ride from the capital and the wolf on my doorstep!"
His gaze lingered on the table as if it had been glued down with tree sap. He seemed to be thinking feverishly.
"The scouts have assured us that Robb Stark remains north of Ashmark," Kevan reported. Tywin snorted contemptuously.
"Ha! The last time the scouts assured us of Stark's intentions he lured us into a trap! Which is why my son is now his prisoner."
He stood up and walked around the table. The letters in front of me completely forgotten, my gaze was fixed tensely on the head of the Lannisters. He stopped by the fireplace and propped himself against the ledge.
"Too close to Casterly Rock."
"He has sent a small band to retake Winterfell," Kevan reported further, "The Greyjoys have done us a great favour. Stark will not risk attacking Casterly Rock until he is at full strength."
"He's a young boy and he's never lost a battle," Tywin replied, "He'll always fight at full risk because he's not experienced enough to be afraid."
He pushed himself away from the fireplace, looked thoughtfully at the ground for a moment and then stepped behind the chairs of his men. They all looked at him expectantly; he seemed to have made a decision.
"We ride at nightfall. I want a full night's head start before he realises we are on our way. Clegane, you will maintain a base here in Harrenhal. Track down this Brotherhood and destroy them!"
The Mountain, who had been silent all this time, looked gravely at the Lion and nodded.
"Understood, my lord."
"And the little one..."
Tywin suddenly turned to me. I quickly returned my gaze to the two piles in front of me, pretending I had just finished my work. Slowly I looked up, meeting the lord's thoughtful gaze.
"Yes, my lord?" I asked quietly into the rising silence. What would follow now? His gaze rested calmly on me, stroking his beard thoughtfully before he slowly took his seat again.
"You will accompany me."
Before I could say anything in reply, he looked to the others.
"On now, move and don't take root!"
They all left the room in single file while his gaze continued to be on me.
"Is my armour ready?"
"Yes, my lord."
"Help me with the straps in a moment. Stow the letters in a bag. I'll read them later then."
He was already disappearing into his bedchamber while I carefully stowed the letters in a bag. Then I followed him and helped him into his armour.
"Why do you want me to accompany you?", I dared to ask, "I would only get in the way unnecessarily."
I did not know why, but secretly I was now hoping for warm words from him. I hoped for the reasoning that he would like my company too much or something of the sort.
But once again I was wrong.
"You know too much about my battle plans," he replied, letting me tighten his straps, "Leaving you here would be a danger."
Again it hit me. I really should have known.
"Do you not trust me, my lord?"
His eyes met mine, I saw his jaw grind. An oppressive silence spread before he spoke.
"You go on down to the courtyard, I'll join you in a moment."
I swallowed hard before stepping back and turning away, nodding.
How had I felt anything but hatred for him for even a moment? The fever-stricken Lord Tywin was a thing of the past; this was the dreaded Lord Tywin again. And I had to accept that for once....

~~~

I looked at her for a long time. Did I trust her? She had helped me through my fever. She was there when I needed help, albeit reluctantly. I trusted her completely! But how did it come across when I told her the truth? That I took her along not only because of her wide knowledge, but mainly for another reason. I liked her company. The concentrated look, the way she ran her tousled blonde hair when she was trying to understand something. That curious twinkle in the blue-grey eyes as soon as I told her something. Even if I didn't understand, I couldn't bear the idea of her being here with Clegane. He wouldn't have treated her with the respect she deserved. She was a lot smarter than him and she might have had to pay for it. No, I wouldn't put Lena through that! She had done her job well so far, leaving her behind would have been an imposition, almost punishment.
Why do you care so much about her, Tywin, I asked myself and tied my sword around. She comes from one of the poorest classes, she should not be of concern to you! But to my astonishment she was. And no matter how hard I tried, I could not banish these thoughts....