𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥 | carlisle cullen

(𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫) forget to fall down

Song for this chapter
Northern Downpour - Panic! at the disco

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BY JULY, ESTELLA HAD TO STOP herself from counting the days. Of course it was all her father talked about. This had been the case for years except she had managed to hold it off. However the dam was breaking now and no matter how hard she tried to hold it off, the water was pouring through.

Often she wished they'd had at least a couple more years. Maybe she would've been able to convince Carlisle to runaway. They could've ran away to Italy and seen all the places he'd talked about. Estella already felt that his words had left images clear enough that she could escape even when she simply closed her eyes.

Carlisle seemed to be under the impression that there was nothing they could do. She tried not to feel hurt by this mainly because she knew he was right. It wasn't plausible for them to runaway and if it had been there was still something holding Carlisle back.

Estella wished she had the courage to ask what it was that left him unable to give her everything. From the beginning she had known that he was different yet she'd ignored this for her own good. She didn't want to know his secret, she didn't want to know the complications of them being together. All she wanted was more time. She wanted the stereotypical life with him. She wanted him to propose himself to her, for them to marry in some extravagant ceremony. She wanted to raise his children and eventually grow older and watch them repeat the same process with the people they loved.

Of course this was a storm in her young mind. She was in no rush for any of this to happen. Estella was content to live in the moment. The problem was how limited these moments really were.

She cherished the nights they spent together. Carlisle continued to leave his post earlier, as early as he could. Fridays and Saturdays were the days she dreamed for. The Friday night where she'd lie with her head against him, her hair lying in dark pools along his pale chest. On Saturdays their lives would be full with the words of the other. Stories never ran short when they were blessed with the inspiration to tell them.

Estella had never understood the beauty of Washington until she walked with him. It was more delightful in the summer although Carlisle always preferred to stay in the shade. This hadn't surprised her at all. His skin was so light that she supposed it would burn within seconds of the heat.

Estella however was not a stranger to the beacon of amber light. She danced in the sun, allowing her skin to soak up the shine. The warmth blossomed over her so that when she ran back to Carlisle and threw her arms around him, she hoped he could feel it too.

He stayed in the outskirts of the light, usually in the sanctuary of the trees. However he watched her with such longing, Estella wondered if this was more than the longing he felt for her.