Better Off Alone (Adopted by Brendon and Sarah Urie)

28. Callie

The last thing I remember before waking up in an ambulance were the boys touching me. And the one at my pants.

When I opened my eyes I saw Dad almost right away. He smiled and said I was okay.

They took me to the back when we got to the hospital, but didn't let Dad stay. A little while later, Mom came in. The doctors and the nurses and the police had to examine me. And they had to look where the boys had touched. I cried but Mom held my hand and when they were done, the nurse gave me something to help me sleep.

The boys had tried to do what my dad had done after my mom died. He said it was my fault he had to do those things but because it was my fault he didn't have a wife, I had to let him do things to me that husbands do with their wives.  He'd said if I hadn't killed my mother, he wouldn't have to do these things to me.

He was big and it hurt every time. Sometimes, he made me kiss it first. And sometimes he made me put it in my mouth and he'd move in and out of my mouth until something came out of him. And he'd make me swallow that.  Then he'd put it inside me and do it again until that hot liquid came out of him again.

That's what the boys were trying to do. Until someone pulled them off of me just before I passed out.  And then the doctors and the nurses had to look in there, too.

Mom kept trying to tell me it was okay, and I was brave, but they were touching and looking at the place my dad said was the only thing I was useful for. And that no one but him should ever go there.

Then he decided I wasn't worth even that, and got rid of me.

At my first foster home, the foster dad did some of the same things my dad did. The foster mom found out and hit me and then got rid of me. The Cunninghams were nice and they told me that's not what good parents do. They helped me see that what my dad did, and some of my foster dads and foster brothers even, was wrong. For a little while, they got me a counsellor, too. But then I got sent away again.

I couldn't let Mom and Dad know that my dad did those things to me. They'd get rid of me for sure.

When I woke up again, I was in a room. Mom and Dad were right beside me. Dad smiled at me and said good morning. I started to cry and signed that the boys had touched me.

Mom and Dad reassured me that I was okay and that they hadn't done anything. Dad pulled me into a hug and I cried.

When I was done crying I looked up at Mom and Dad and asked when Sheri was moving me.

"She's not," Mom said. "We told you, you're home. You're ours. You're in your forever home."

"But," I said. "The boys. They were going to do what."

I stopped. I couldn't tell them.

"Nothing that has happened in your past is any reason that we would consider giving you up. We adopted you for keeps. If there are things in your past you don't want to discuss with us, that's okay. But if there are, we'd like you to talk to someone who can maybe help you. But you're home, Callie. You're home," Mom said, hugging me.

I wanted to believe her. I really did.

We laid around for a little while before a doctor came in and spoke with us. He even brought an interpreter.

They said since I was awake, didn't have a headache and didn't seem to have a concussion, he was happy to let me go home and follow up with my own doctor.

Once the discharge papers were signed and brought to my room, Dad left so Mom could help me change back into my clothes.

Mom pushed me in a wheelchair while Dad went to get the car. They helped me into the car and we went home.

As soon as we got home, I went upstairs and curled up on my bed.

The door knock sensor went off, but I didn't get off my bed. I stayed curled up. It was Dad.

"Your grandparents are still coming," he said. "They'll be here in time for dinner."

I let the tears flow.

"Hey," Dad said, sitting beside me. "What's this?"

"Do they know?" I asked.

"About last night? No. Not really. They know we were in the hospital and that some boys tried to beat you up. But about the other thing they tried? No."

"They're going to make you send me away," I said.

"No they aren't. That is not their decision."

I didn't say anything. Dad sat beside me, rubbing my back.

"Are you hungry?" He asked. "Want lunch?"

I shook my head.

"Nothing?"

I shook my head.

"I'm going downstairs. If you want anything, just text, or come on down, okay? I'll let you stay here and figure things out for a little, but then, I'm coming back to check on you. Ok?"

I nodded.

Dad ruffled my hair and gave me a kiss on the head. He left my door just slightly open.

I lay still on my bed. The door pushed slightly open and Bogart poked his head inside. He saw me, hopped up on my bed and curled up beside me.

I lay there petting Bogart until apparently, I fell asleep.