This is War (War Series #3)

Chapter 49

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Chapter 49

Different

I've had enough of hoping for things like promises and of dreaming of a future I want. Minahal ko ang pag-ibig noon at sobrang ganda ng tingin ko sa buhay. Inosente ako sa lahat ng pangit sa mundo at parating maliwanag ang pagtingin ko sa bawat sitwasyon.

Not until life and love itself betrayed me.

Minsan ko nang isinumpa ang buhay at pagmamahal dahil pinaasa ako ng lahat ng 'yon at iniwang nasasaktan sa huli. I hated myself for dreaming, believing, and hoping.

Pero sa paglipas ng mga panahon, unti-unti kong natanggap ang katotohanan. I was able to see how reality looks like. . .and how important it is to still have hope for a beautiful future.

Hanniel made me realize it. Allon was the one who made me bring her back again—the old Hanani whose heart flutters at the idea of both love and life.

Whenever I look at him, I picture a future I want to experience by his side. Whenever he talks to me, I unconsciously pray to be loved by him until we grow old and our eyes blur after maximizing our years of living.

Sa tuwing kasama niya si Hanniel, hindi ko mapigilang hilingin na sana, dumating ang araw na kaming tatlo ang masayang magkakasama.

Allon makes me want to hope and love again. Along with Hanniel, he makes my black and white world thrive with different vibrant colors.

Love does bring a different shade to colors. Red looked like blood and war during my brokenness, but it becomes love and passion with Allon. Blue looks like deep quiet underwater but it is the sky and peaceful sea when I am with him. Yellow looks like old heartbreaking films when he is not with me, but it is like spring and summer when he is.

Allon changes everything.

Pinagmasdan ko si Allon habang kausap si Hanniel sa hindi kalayuan. Nakaupo silang dalawa sa sahig ng patio ng bahay at mukhang naglalaro sila ng mga laruang eroplano ni Hanniel. Allon is staring at him with a glimmer of emotion in his eyes that I only see whenever he's with my son.

"It's Allon."

Napatingin ako sa katabi kong si Ise at nakita ko ang titig niya kina Allon. Hindi ako sumagot at nilingon ang sala ng bahay kung saan nandoon sina Nari at ang anak nilang si Narisse.

Ipinakilala na kanina ni Ise sina Nari at Narisse kay Hanniel. Kinausap na rin ni Ise ang mga magulang ko at humingi ng tawad.

My parents are still upset with him. Strikto ang pakikipag-usap nila kay Ise at mahahalata ang pagiging ilag nila rito. Naiintindihan ko 'yon. Alam kong naiintidihan din ni Ise kung bakit siya ganito tratuhin ng mga magulang ko at kung bakit maging ako, hindi siya makausap nang higit pa sa pagiging sibilisado.

Hanniel looks like he can't absorb everything immediately. That's why Allon takes my son with him and plays with him on the patio while Ise talks with my parents.

Naaawa at nasasaktan ako para kay Hanniel dahil kailangan niyang maintindihan ang lahat ng ito sa murang edad. But we can't think of anything that will save him from the trouble of facing this reality.

It is the reality we have to face now.

Nang makita ni Hanniel si Narisse, nakita ko ang tuwa niya dahil sa nalamang kapatid niya ito. But I know he's confused why despite his father returning in our lives, he can't still be with us. Alam kong nagtataka rin siya kung bakit nandoon si Nari at kung sino ito sa buhay niya.