Falling apart

Chapter 38

Elle's POV :

Days goes by and now it's Sunday so we are here in Mama Imee's house for the fitting . The whole family is so loud like para kaming nasa palengke right now. Gab is with Andy and the other kids running around while my parents are talking to my tito and titas , kambal is with our Kuyas and I'm here lang sa gilid kasi I dont wanna socialise and I feel so out of place ? I dont know really but I've been feeling so down lately . I feel like I dont have any energy , I wont even notice it until my classmates told me that I dont feel like me . They said I'm always spacing out . I visited my psychologist last Friday and Doc. Santos said that maybe it's because of stress and she even told me that it triggered my anxiety. I really don't know what is wrong with me . Until Mama Imee calls us kasi susukatan na kami . "Kids ! Kayo na ang susukatan ! Pick here kung ano ang gusto nyong suotin dali !" Mama Imee said excitedly . We pick our outfits but kambal and I wanted the same dress that I wanna wear. "Oh you want it kambal ? Gusto mo twinning tayo ?" Tanong nya. "No it's fine I'll fined something else nalang !" I said and smile even though I want the dress so bad , well she said that we can be twinning but I dont want to , hindi naman sa maarte ako but I think We'll all look better in different outfits kasi kaya I chose another dress nalang . Maganda naman kaya no problem hehe. Nang matapos na kami at nakauwi na ang mga stylists ay humiga na ako sa couch and close my eyes while the elders are talking about the catering stuff et cetera . Naghaharutan sila kambal running around with my Kuyas nang kulitin nya ako. "Kambal dali na ! Sumali ka na samin ! It so fun oh !" Pang aaya nya kahit ilang beses ko na syang tinanggihan until napuno na ako. "SABING AYOKO NGA EHH ! DONT YOU UNDERSTAND ?!! IM RESTING HERE CAN'T YOU SEE ?!!" I yelled na ikinagulat ng lahat even I was shock. I tried to calm myself down before reaching out to kambal. "Kambal ..." I was about to hold her nang lumayo sya. "Bakit ka ganyan ? You've changed a lot !! I don't know you anymore !" She said while her tears are falling. You're so screwed Emmanuelle ! She run upstairs before I can even say sorry. "Kambal !" I yelled but she didn't look back , I bit my lip and rub my head , Napahilamos nalang ako and when I opened my eyes I can feel my Mom's death stare . "What was that Ellie ? Your was just trying to have some fun with you and your cousins bakit hindi mo pa pinagbigyan ? Sinigawan mo pa ?" Mama Irene said calmly but I know she's dead mad . I just roll my eyes and stand up. "Hey ! Do not act like that to your Mom ! Hindi ka namin pinalaki ng ganyan !" Galit na sabi ni Dad . "Mom ! Dad ! She needs to grow up ! Hindi lahat ng bagay umiikot sa kanya ." I said facing them. Tumalikod ulit ako but Mom spoke again. "Well kung hindi naman sya na comatose she'll be thinking the same way as you do." Masungit na sabi ni Mom. "Yeah ! Right ! Edi lumabas din yung totoo ! All these years ! Ako parin ang sinisisi mo about the incident !" I said and walk upstairs pero pinigilan nya ako. "Anak please wag ngayon ! Baka marinig ka ng kambal mo ." Mom plead. "Edi malaman nya . Wag nyo nga syang gawing tanga ! Kailan nyo pa ba sasabihin sa kanya ? Ha ? Pagod na pagod na akong mag sinungaling !" I said and run into Mama Imee's room because kambal and I share the same room here.

I can't breathe I shouted the hell out of me and cried. All the emotions are more mixed I feel guilt and uncertainty . I feel my body shaking . I found a corner at sumiksik doon I hug myself and cried .

Imee's POV :

"Gosh Irene ! Why did you say that ?!" I ask when I hear Elle slammed the door. "I... I didn't mean to hurt her ! I was just saying that -" Irene explained pero hindi na sya nakapalag nang si Mama na ang mag salita. "Irene , alam mo namang nagdaramdam pa rin yan si Elle about the incident tapos sinumbat mo pa sa kanya yun ! And Elle is right kailan mo pa sasabihin kay Tine ang naging hidwaan nyo ni Elle ? In that way tinuturuan mo rin mag sinungaling yung bata." Mama said. "Mom's right Irene , you should tell na kay Tine about what happened two years ago ." Liza said. "Hindi talaga maghihilom ang sugat nyong pamilya kung may sekreto pa rin kayo sa isa't isa ." Bonget said. "And Mom ang babaw babaw ng away nung dalawa sinumbat mo agad yun kay Elle ? Mali naman yata yun." Alfonso said. "Below the belt yun Mom alam mo naman na mabilis maiinis yun si Elle pag pagod ." Luis said . We heard Elle shouting . "Should I follow her ?" Tanong ko. "Yes Manang please ?" Irene said I went upstairs and for sure she's in my room . I open the door and couldn't find her .