awkward.

twenty-four

OTM

I ran down the stairs and opened the door when I got that text from Bey. She was wearing flannel pajama pants and a plain white shirt.

"Hey Bey." I moved to the side to let her in, even this felt awkward.

"Hi." Hi?? That's it?

"Do you wanna talk in my room?"

"Sure."

"I just restocked on snacks if you're hungry." I closed the door and walked up the stairs first, my ass was unintentionally all in her face.

"Where is your mom? I've never seen her and I've never really heard you mention her either."

"She's at work. She works a lot and when she's not working, she's exhausted. I actually saw your mom not too long ago."

"What? When?" My room door was already open so we just walked in and she closed it after.

"When I got your sister to help me in your house. She's pretty, you look like a younger version of her and Solo looks like a younger version of you."

"Oh."

I sat down on my bed and she sat down on the opposite corner of the bed. I frowned, "Why are you all the way over there?"

"So we can talk. Tell me how you feel."

My friends helped me and I already had everything I wanted to say planned out in my head.

Now that I was in front of her, I couldn't say it. This stuff is not for me, I wish she just knew I liked her and didn't make me say it.

No words were coming out of my mouth. I couldn't tell her but maybe she would let me show her.

I crawled on the bed over to her and I was going to kiss her but she moved back.

"What are you doing?"

"Uh telling you how I feel like you asked?" Is that not obvious?

"Kissing me isn't telling me anything. I want to hear how you feel in words, Onika."

Okay, I guess I really have to do this.

Lauren said tell her I like her but I want to take things slow. I can do that.

I embarrassedly went back to where I was sitting. She was looking at me waiting on my to say something, I think that made it worse.

I couldn't talk with her eyes on me so I put the blanket over my head. I whispered, "I like you too."

If this was over text, I would've been able to put my phone on do not disturb and run away but I can't.

It felt like something was on do not disturb because she didn't say anything.

I pulled the blanket down and she was just looking at me smiling. She was smiling so hard, I could see all her teeth.

"You're not going to say anything back?"

She hugged me but it felt more like a tackle than a hug. She was on the other side of the bed so she had to lunge a little bit.

"I already knew you liked me but I'm glad you said it."

I laughed louder than I should've. "How did you know I liked you but I had you all in your feelings."

"I was never in my feelings, Onika." Its so funny when she says my name in her strong ass country accent.

"Yeah, okay liar."

"So you like me?" She was still smiling like a dummy.

"No, I was lying." I had to be sarcastic. Did I not just say that idid a second ago?