3 9 . t r u t h o u t

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The moment I try pulling out my phone from my back pocket, I groan a bit when the device slips from my grasp right to the brick grounds of the entrance of my university. I bend down to grab the device before tagging myself in, dusting the phone against my pants. I then unlock it to see if I have any notifications I didn't respond to, all whilst having perhaps one of the most biggest, carefree and meaningful grins on my face.

I can't even believe it. I feel free. I am free. My shoulders are relaxed and back is too, my chin is held up high. I feel like nothing can break me down at such a point in my life. Like a butterfly, I've finally broken out of my cocoon and I am ready to take flight with such confidence. Even my walk carries confidence, I can feel that, too.

Amber <3:
- When are you coming? Meet up with me at lunch?

I pout a bit, humming as I think of an answer.

Me:
- Just got to school, I should be at the table now.

I lock the screen and put my phone in the back pocket of my pants.

After my conversation with Mrs Jones and hearing all that she was able to share with me, at least with every detail she could possibly remember, we had decided to part ways to go on our day. She left and I stayed for a few more minutes, just sitting staring outside with a content aura radiating off of me in thick waves. Everything she said, even the way she assured and then reassured me. It feel like jumping into ice cold water and coming out after having every single cell in my body get back to life. It felt surreal.

My steps falter a bit in thought. It's not a dream, is it?

Shrugging a bit, I continue walking to my destination, squinting a bit when I see somebody familiar. With a grin, I start walking quicker towards him.

"David! Hey, David!"

The brown boy, walking towards the same destination as mine, turns his head at the sound of his name being called. He even goes as far as lowering his shades at the bridge of his nose as his eyes scan the open environment of rather relaxed students, before they lock with mine. I grin, waving at him, but the greeting I get from him is little to nonexistent.

He looks at me, looks away as he continues walking but his speed slows. It's almost like he's not sure if he should continue walking or actually slow down for his friend. My grin falters a bit, and then I speed my walk to catch up to him. As soon as I'm close to him, he pulls of his shades and shakes his head, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Hi David," I give a small smile and a wave accompanies it. "Nice to see you too. How was your weekend? Mine was good, thanks for asking."

"Oh, I'll bet your weekend was fine, since you ran away from being confronted." That's his answer, and he already starts walking away — of course, to the same destination as mine.

I'm confused. I frown and follow suit, adjusting the strap of my bag. "Confronted? About what? What did I run away from?" The boy shakes his head again as though having no response. "Why are you being so cold toward me? What did I do— David."

"Oh, don't worry about it, wena Zinhle. Since you actually had the audacity to show yourself, let the group see you before I say anything." [you]

My steps slow down a bit for him to be before me, walking with confident strides as mine carry curiosity and concern. What happened? What did I miss? What did I do?

Today started fine. Better than fine. I was set free and I still am, and now my whole mood has been brought down right to the ground, and I can't even understand why. Gone is my happy aura, gone is the confidence I was carrying, and I feel my throat start to clog up at the reality that genuinely, I can't seem to get a break for at least 24 hours without something popping up and smashing the little bit of peace I can build up — excluding when I was with Avery, and even still, whatever peace I can have in that moment doesn't last. All that comes crumbling down the moment the wrecking ball of problems swings.

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