Damn that oxymoron...

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Basil woke up earlier than normal. He hadn't slept well anyway, so it wasn't surprising. He looked to his hands, and awkwardly spoke aloud, "Alright..."

He did have control over his body. He felt wary ever since "Omori" took him over yesterday.

Basil looked at the wall in front of him for a few moments before leaving his bed. He twisted his hair with anxiety for a few moments, before he walked down the stairs. A bright morning for it only being 6am.

Basil yawned, and turned the corner, to see the kitchen empty. So was the living room. Polly must've still been sleeping.

Basil grabbed the bread bag and peanut butter from a nearby shelf. He put two slices on the cutting board that was perched on the counter, and took a butter knife from the drawer. He smeared the peanut butter onto the bread, cringing when he slightly tore the bread.

God I'm so worthless...

He put the other slice of bread on top. Jam was overrated anyway. Basil had only eaten one bite when the loud doorbell sounded. Basil meandered towards the door, quickening when the doorbell began to sound on repeat.

Basil swung the door open to see who was deciding to repeatedly click the doorbell at such an early hour. Mikhael, of course.

"Hey Basil! Is your doorbell broken? I didn't hear anything when I pressed it..." Mikhael asked.

"It definitely isn't, Mikhael, why are you here so early?" Basil counter-questioned.

Mikhael made a face for a second, "It's 'The Maverick' Basil, please remember that."

Basil put his hand to his face. It was really too early for this. "Yeah, yeah, alright, The Maverick, got it. So why are you here right now..?" Basil said trying not to sound exasperated.

Mikhael struck a pose, "The Maverick wants your advice! So since we're gonna be eating these or whatever later..." Mikhael held up a bag of mushrooms, "I just wanted to ask do you know what they're called? You're a plant guy, after all!" Mikhael smiled in an attempt at looking charming.

"Uh... yeah I guess. I don't really know mushrooms, but they look like..."

They're just fucking brown mushrooms??? What am I supposed to say???

"Yeah, they're uh, safe to eat, I don't know their name though, since I forgot." Basil lied. He had absolutely no knowledge on any mushroom besides the ones at the store, and the portabello mushrooms, which the guy at Gino's refused to put on pizzas. A similar reaction to when requesting olives or pineapples.

"Aw, alright I'll have to ask grandma again. She told me the name but I forgot... I was sill... billow... or... wait..." Mikhael made some more weird "umms" and "ahhs" before Basil cut it short.

"Alright, sure, so if that's all, then I think I'm gonna go finish my sandwich." Basil said, still trying to wake up, not helped by Mikhael's nonsense.

Polly came down the stairs behind Basil. She was not one who would stand for Basil briskly brushing Mikhael off, and Mikhael was going to make a fool of himself since there was a woman nearby.

I should've ended this sooner.

"Oh, Basil, you're up early! Who's at the door?" Polly asked sleepily.

Before Basil could say "salesman" and slam the door, Mikhael spoke up. "Why hello, m'lady! It's been quite a while!"

"Oh, is that your friend Mikhael? Is he feeling better?" Polly smiled.

Mikhael waved his arm through the door at Polly, "Yes, miss! Great, strong, and var-rile!"

Did he really just say virile?

Thankfully, his pronunciation was so wrong that Polly hadn't understood, "That's great, dear, Basil, why don't you invite your friend in for breakfast?"

"It's fine Polly, I'm sure he already had breakfast." Basil attempted to cut it short, but Mikhael was a fast talker.

"Nope! I skipped it to head over here to see Basil." Mikhael said, putting his hand to his chin.

"Aw, how sweet, bring your friend in Basil!" Polly said, turning her attention to the fridge, "I better make you two some breakfast!"

"I already have mine, Polly." Basil said, taking another bite from his sandwich.

"Ah, okay then, just breakfast for me and... your name, dear?" Polly asked, turning back to Mikhael.

"You can call me, The Maverick, ma'am!" Mikhael said with an attempt at a charming smirk, he then turned to Basil, "Your sister is real pretty, man." he spoke loudly in order for Polly to hear.

Basil groaned, but it seems Polly fell for Mikhael's flattery, "I'm almost 30 now, far too old to be his sister, hon! Haha, thank you though, I'm just his caretaker." Basil walked over to the couch, as Mikhael made some flimsy one-liner.

Mikhael soon followed, "So you aren't related, huh? You must've thought about a lot of things when she's-"

Basil felt mad for the first time in a while, "Just drop it, Mikhael. If you're going to think shit like that, keep it to yourself at least." Basil said in an aggressive hushed tone.

Mikhael raised his hands, and flattened his expression. "So, grandma said to only eat this with friends, so I think we should maybe go over to my grandma's, and all eat some I guess."

Basil raised his eyebrow, "...what does it do..?"

"No clue, but I'm too curious to just not eat it. Gam-ga- I mean grandma would never give me something poisonous or anything, so I know it isn't deadly." Mikhael punctuated his somewhat quiet statement with an over-the-top laugh. The type you'd hear from like, a hero from a TV show.

Does he just laugh like that??

"What's with the face?" Mikhael asked cluelessly.

"It's nothing." Basil took a bite of his sandwich again, as Polly handed Mikhael his PB&J. This time with the "J" included. Mikhael's ogling made Basil lose his appetite for the rest of his sandwich.

Hormonal teenager try not to be weird challenge: impossible???


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