Pretend (Harry Styles) - Book 3

Chapter 61: An Unexpected Visitor

34 Weeks Along

-Ava's POV-

I roll over in bed slowly as my alarm goes off, groaning from my lack of sleep.

My hand smacks down onto the top of the clock, cutting off the annoying sound abruptly. I slide back down into the covers, my mind immediately playing over last nights events.

The pain I'd felt last night scared me beyond belief. Waking up to that I was sure something was horribly wrong.

But the baby is alright. She's alright.

I was dealing with so much already, sitting there in that hospital room.
And on top of all of it, there was Harry.

I thought I had prepared myself for it. I knew at some point I would see him. Whether I wanted to or not he was the father, he would always be a part of our little girl's life.

I had even planned out what I would say and how I would say it. I had months to think about it, months to harden my heart against him.

I thought I'd done it.

But I was so wrong.

The second I saw him, my entire plan was shot to hell. Every single aspect of it.

So many emotions washed over me I couldn't even remember what my plan had been.

All I could do was cry.

I had fooled myself into thinking I'd completely turned off all my feelings for him. But feelings that strong can just be turned off.

I was able to ignore them for awhile, but they're there. They always will be.

I'm still hurt. Still so so hurt by what he said.

But I love him.

My reaction to seeing him proved it. I couldn't even look at him.

I knew if I did, if I looked in those green eyes long enough, the small amount of self control I was holding on to would slip away. And I would be in his arms in seconds.

Wanting the comfort only he can give me. Needing the support from the one person who knows me better then anyone else.

But I couldn't. I couldn't let myself be pulled back in by him. He's broken my heart so many times. To many times.

I'm tired of being hurt. Tired of putting all my trust in him only for it to happen again. And this time was a hundred times worse then anything he'd done before.

I know what I said was hurtful. I shouldn't of said it. I didn't mean it.

But I never thought Harry was capable of saying something like that to me.

I trusted him. With all my secrets. With all the pain of my past. With my heart.

And with those seven words he threw it all back in my face.

But still, with all that.. With all the hurt and anger and shock of what happened... I still love him.

How can I still love him?

I take a deep breath, throwing the covers off my body. I need to think about something else, anything else, or I'm going to go crazy.

I stand up, stretching my limbs as my stomach growls. I don't bother putting a robe on before leaving my room, knowing Poppy is gone working all day.

I pad down the hallway, a yawn escaping my lips as I enter the living room. The yawn abruptly turning into a shriek the second my eyes land on the couch.