The Bond Between Us

eighty-one

Luke was gone, you discovered once you had the strength to walk through the damage. R2 was there and told you that Luke had run. You and R2 moved slowly as you walked through the bodies of students and the burning buildings. It was now raining, the weather matching your emotions and turning the fires to dying embers.

How were you going to explain this to Leia and Han?

You thought about running yourself, not wanting to face Leia and Han. You believed this to be all your fault, Ben's fall from the light. Though, deep down you knew that you couldn't control his choices and how he perceived things. It took everything you had in you to take R2 and yourself back to Leia and Han's home.

The couple was already waiting for you on the landing pad. Leia had felt that something was wrong and had been trying to get ahold of you, Luke, and Ben. When you exited your ship with R2, who had turned himself off now. They knew that this was about Ben. They ushered you inside while Chewie and C3PO took care of R2. You refused to sit down despite Han and Leia requesting you did. To them, you looked like you could fall over at any second.

"I'm sorry," you croaked, unable to stop the sobs. "I'm so sorry."

Those few words confirmed their worst fears. They stood there unable to speak as they process what your words truly meant. Your head fell into your hands and you let out heart-wrenching sobs. Ben was the closest thing you would ever have to a son. He was also so much like Anakin that you felt like you had a piece of him with you. Now, history was repeating itself with Ben, leaving you devastated as always.

"It's not your fault," Leia tried to be strong as she spoke.

"How can you say that?" You questioned. "I took it upon myself to help him, you trusted me to help him."

"It's not your fault," Leia repeated.

You looked at Han through your tears. He wasn't speaking or even looking at you. Suddenly, he turned around and walked out. Leia chased after him, leaving you an emotional mess on the couch.

~~~

After passing out due to the emotional drain the whole situation was taking on you, you woke up to someone carrying you. Your eyes opened and you saw Han. He was looking straight ahead, you could see the redness of his eyes as if he had been crying. He carried you to your bedroom.

"Han?" You whispered as he gently placed you on your bed.

"I'm leaving," he stated. There was so much emotion in his words and you could feel the turmoil swirling within him.

"What?"

"I'm leaving."

"When?"

"Tonight... right now."

"Han—"

"You can come with me. If you need to run, you can come with me and Chewie."

You honestly took a moment to think about it. You could run. Run away from your problems and smuggle with Han and Chewie. Or you could stay and help Leia with the Senate. The thought of leaving Leia made you sick.

"Han... you know I can't," you shook your head. "I can't leave Leia."

"I figured you'd say that," Han said.

"Don't leave. Stay."

Han shook his head. "I can't. I need to go." He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your head. You closed your eyes as he held his lips there. When he pulled away, you met his gaze. His eyes were getting glassy, tears forming. "There's always space for you on the Falcon, kid. Just say the word and I'll come to get you. Wherever you may be."