DEAR SIYA

CHAPTER NINETEEN

CHAPTER NINETEEN

I AM NOT LEAVING

Me: "Okay DJ Ayanda, please listen to me"

She just laughed when she heard me say that and Atleast she's slowly unwinding.

Her: "Please don't start with the 'i love you both the same way' speech because there's no such thing. Siya I should have left when I had the chance, I should've left before I fell for you the way I did then it would've been easier. Now I can't leave because my heart wouldn't allow me to but one thing is that I don't wanna do is be in competition with other girls for you, for your attention. It's like I'm slowly losing myself for you. I love you way too deep that I chose to ignore all the red flags about you. I sometimes just wonder why you keep following me around like you always do when you could have any other girl of your choice but sometimes I'm just glad that you chose to follow me around crazy right? but I cannot just stay as the side chick and watch you have whichever girl you be having while I stay on the sidelines waiting for you to remember that oh konje there's uAyanda"

Me: "Ayanda, I love you and I am not gonna sit in your house and discuss other girls that are involved in my life with you and not because I'm trying to protect my ego or anything like that but I'd rather not and in the midst of it all I want you to understand is that there is a reason why I'm here with you and not uZimi who you bit up. There's a reason I followed you the other day and tried to have a conversation with you after I bumped you at the busses. There's a reason I fall in love with you each day and there is a reason why things are just complicated right now. Ayanda I don't blame you for wanting to leave, I'm a mess and I always seem to fuck up everything that I touch in my life. I am not perfect and I'm sorry to say this but I'm just struggling to commit I don't know. I'd understand if you wanna leave and this time I'd totally let you be. The problem is not with you. I just can't seem to get my shit together. You are a beautiful human being, in all aspects and if you feel like I am too much of a bargain for you then I'll understand."

Her: "I'm not leaving you"

I looked at her confused with my heart beating so fast. What is she saying?

Her: "I love you and It's difficult for me to let you go"

Me: "Ayanda wa reng Pila Pila?"

Her: "I'm not leaving but I'm giving you three months to decide what you truly want and I'd totally understand if you decide that you do not want me after that"

My face just lit up.

I grabbed her hands and held them into mine.

Me: "Thank you "

I kissed her knuckles. She stood up and reached out for a hug and I stood up too and hugged her. We stayed like that for a few minutes

Me: "I love you"

Her: "I love you too"

Mann it feels so great to hear her say that.

Afterwards she stood up and went to the kitchen but I followed her

Me: "So tell me"

She just nodded and continued looking for something in the cardboards

Me: "a DJ? Wow that was unexpected"

She just chuckled

Her: "Yeah, crazy right?"