My $ugar Mommy [Jenlisa]

Chapter 32

*/" Hi are you still waiting for me? :<

THIRD PERSON POV

The storm had felt like a rumor all day, but now, the sky was delivering. For a second, like a knife catching a glint of light and refracting it in multitude, everything gleamed white. The lightning split the whole sky in half, and in that moment, it was brighter than daylight. The tops of the gravestones seemed to pulse like strobe lights in a night club before blackness settled them down again.

She was kneeling in front of her girlfriend grave. She came here often-after all, that's what a mourning girlfriend did-but she felt better coming at night. Shrouded in darkness, she could be herself, and she could feel what she wanted to-which, sometimes, was nothing. A cavernous, echoey space of emptiness. Perhaps there was a bit of pride if she were being honest. Along with a genuine sense of connection, even though her gf was nothing more than a skeleton six feet under. Funny, how it took death to rekindle a connection that hadn't existed since the womb. Either way, the emotions weren't appropriate for daytime mourning.

The lightning seemed suitable for tonight. It's almost a month when her girlfriend death. And it lit something up inside of her too, a dark part of her that she didn't always feel comfortable touching. In the dynamic moment when everything became bright, she leaned forward and put her lips on the cold stone. She was certain that whatever plane of existence her gf lived on in, her head was exploding at this artificial expression of tenderness.

She had walked and killed herself on the freeway. The girl I loved more than anything had tried to kill herself for the third time and succeeded. - The thai girl said in her own thoughts

Did you hear that right her girlfriends trying to kill herself before when she's still alive but the thai girl always cought her.

"My love, how are you, it's been a month since you left me and until now I still can't believe that you're gone,. At least now you won't experience the pains you used feel when you were alive, I'm sorry my love I didn't keep my promises to you I'm so S-sorry" She said while crying then suddenly a cold wind hugged her It's like a hint that she's about to say goodbye.

"I have to go babe dad is waiting to the hostpital" She smile in pain she put some flower then she sighed before she left.

I would run seven miles and back to her grave just to promise her I would make it as a fighter like she knew and had told me she knew and was proud of me.

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Jennie's Pov

Its 5:37 in the morning. Can't sleep. Another restless night. Not a bright start to my day.

Its been 37 days since the last time I heard her voice. 49 days since I saw her face,held her hand and kissed her cheeks. According to her calculations, I should've been doing well by now. Calculations can be wrong, specially when done by a girl.

She's doing pretty well I guess. Why not me? Why am I saying this? Questions I have no answer to.

My first break-up. Its not that I was dying to achieve it and am very proud of it, I just didn't realise it would happen to me. I guess nobody does, so lost in each other's love. One doesn't really give it ample thought as long as the fake promises and lies keeps the other at bay. Atleast it was true for me.

To wake up every fvcking morning and think of her is a torment. Every morning I wake up and my first thoughts are Another day! How am I gonna pass this? I should stop thinking about her. She doesn't care for me. I shouldn't too. I must be strong. I miss her. Miss her voice, her hands in mine, her suppressed smile, that funny mark on her face, that nodding of her head to every agreement ,that face she makes to every dislike, her tiny cute nose and some traces of hair on it, her doe eyes...her kiss...everything.'