Chapter 81 Truth

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Madam Lan looks at Lan Zhan, really looks at him. Lan Zhan is staring back, determination fierce and bright in his golden eyes. He isn't going to back down easily, if at all.

"Haizi, what will it accomplish by talking about the past now? Both your father and I, we are no longer part of the mortal realm." She says gently.

But she already knows that Lan Zhan isn't going to listen to her. Out of her two children, Lan Zhan has always been the stubborn one.

"I want to know, because in my heart, I know Muqin was punished unfairly. I want this clan to atone for what it took from you. Your life." Lan Zhan says.

For the first time in his life, Wei Ying can hear the bitterness in his husband's voice, and if he still had a wish left from anything that could grant him one, he would wish to forever remove this pain from Lan Zhan completely.

"My boy..." She sighs. "Do you ever stop to reconsider that, what you are asking from me, it will have repercussions. You are clever enough to know this. People will be hurt, people who do not deserve to hurt any more. Perhaps it is not my place to decide that, but once this secret gets out, it may yet hurt those affected. Even you."

Lan Zhan's surprise shows on his face. But he is just as adamant.

"I have spent most of my life wondering about the reason. I wish to understand, for myself. No one else needs to know." He defended his request, though.

"Words, once spoken, can never return. I would urge you to think carefully about this, Haizi." Madam Lan has lost the ability to laugh now.

Whatever she is going to say, Wei Ying has a bad feeling about it, and he for one, doesn't want to know anything more. But at the same time, he understands why Lan Zhan needs to know. He wants to give this last offering to his mother, to give her peace and eternal light by clearing her name.

He doesn't want to ask if this is really for his mother, or for himself?

Lan Zhan, who rarely asks anything for himself, is doing it now.

Wei Ying wants to throw his arms around him, hug Lan Zhan tightly to his chest, and protect him from the shadows of his past.

"I am sure, Muqin. Please tell us." Lan Zhan sounds firm, as solid as the wall of Discipline.

Wei Ying is distracted by that thought, because therein lies another problem yet to be fixed. Lan Zhan and his drunken graffiti session.

"Very well. Do you still have the comb that belonged to me? The Ivory one? It was a courting gift," she asks him.

Gone is the playful woman who was just here; in her place is someone aware of the devastation she is about to wreck, and powerless to do anything about it.

"Mn. I have it."

"In his possession, your brother holds an old music box. That's if it hasn't been thrown away yet. It doesn't work. I am going to tell you only that, and hope you fail to solve this riddle. But if you do manage to work it out, and if you still have questions, then I will wait for you to ask them." She's reluctantly stern.

"Muqin, about the combs, I have another question." Lan Zhan says quickly, scared that she has had enough and is about to go away.

"Ask me. Not about the puzzle; that, you have to figure out yourself."

Lan Zhan's nod is solemn and just as serious in return.

Wei Ying can see little quirks, mannerisms that Lan Zhan has inherited from his beloved mother. He's in awe that he's allowed this gift, too.

It's in the way that Lan Zhan tilts his head when he's listening intently, the slight crease in his brow when he has to deal with something unsavoury and last but all the more precious for it, the hardly there upturning of his straight lips, the fractional movement reserved for only those closest to him.

It is Lan Zhan's own mask, a barrier to keep the outside world at bay. For his own protection.

And when he lowers it, it is the act of supreme trust, that he can and only in the presence of those whom he is certain will not hurt him.

"There are two combs, the Ivory one and the plain wood one. The one Muqin used for my hair." Lan Zhan continues.

"Mn. What about them?"

"My brother did not recognise the plain one. I wondered why?" Lan Zhan braces himself to hear something terrible, a horrifying truth about the comb that his mother has kept a secret for all these years.

"That's easy," she replies confidently. "He never used the plain one. I never had the chance to do his hair. He always had it done before visiting with me. And I...I never asked him why this was. Perhaps you should be asking him that question."

Lan Zhan's mind is already made up.

"We shall do it now." Lan Zhan stands up.

As soon as he breaks contact with Wei Ying, his mother disappears.

Lan Zhan knew it was going to hurt. He's torn anyway, wanting to stay here safe and sound with his mother. Protect her from anything that would attempt to hurt her. And confronting his brother, who seems to be hiding a few secrets of his own.

If Lan Zhan felt in any way guilty about causing his brother any pain, it vanished at the realisation that Lan XiChen knew something about all of this, and had not shared. The smallest part of him doubted it though, because he had no proof.

He knew XiChen loved him; that was not worth questioning.

But how many times would he be okay with his brother's betrayal?

If it turned out that XiChen did know something more, and had chosen not to tell him, then Lan Zhan was scared of himself. How would he react to it?

For sure, he would not be as accepting as when the punishment of the Discipline whip had taken place.

And there was only one way to find out.

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