Nobody Can Say It's You

15

"Who?"

"I liked to jumped clean outta my skin. It was Dara Elanor!" said Lou Edna "Of all people! I'da never thought I'da run into her out there in that dark back parking lot. But there she was. Dara Elanor in the flesh."

"What in the world was she doing off the mountain at Sadie's at that time of the night?" Hadley asked. "And how do you know it was Dara, Lou Edna, and not Chandra Elanor? I swear I couldn't tell Dara from Chandra if my life depended on it? Those are two twins look exactly alike to me."

"Well, it ain't that hard, Hadley," said Lou Edna. "I asked her which one she was."

"I wouldn't think Dara Elanor could escape Granny Dilcie's eagle eye. But kids are like raccoons. They can get out whenever they want to, I guess. What was she doing out at that time of the evening?" Hadley asked. "It was really late.

"You said it, girlfriend. I asked her that, too," said Lou Edna. "She said she was lookin' for her boyfriend. Seems like they had had some kind of knock-down, drag-out fight over some girl that's been hangin' 'round the cabin makin' moon eyes toward him. 

You know how kids are at that age. Between the jealous hormones and the high level of pent-up energy kids have, I guess it's a miracle any survive into adulthood.

Dara thought he might have took the girl to Sadie's for a night on the town. I guess when you live that far back in the sticks, Sadie's seems like some kinda' right swank digs.

Anyway, I told Dara that me 'n' Ora Lavelle had been there since about six-thirty, 'n' I ain't seen hide ner hair of no young mountain boy nor no moon-eyed girl inside that joint. Only ones in that bar were the over-40 crowd like you 'n' me. Sadie's ain't attracted the younger ones since the Nineties!"

"You got that right," said Hadley. "And I think it's been about that long since I darkened Sadie's door."

"Well," said Lou Edna, "you ain't never been much of a one for nightlife. Your talents lay in lots more refined activities like hittin' the hay early 'n' sawin' logs in your sleep."

"Oh, hush up, Lou Edna," Hadley said. "What did Dara say?"

"She thanked me, real polite like, then she disappeared back into them woods. Turned 'n' ran back into that black night 'n' jungle like a sleek gazelle. How in the world she didn't break her neck in the dark is a puzzle I'll never figure out."

"Young eyes," said Hadley. "It makes a difference. Plus those twins have lived out in those woods long enough to have become kindred spirits with Nature."

"Umm," said Lou Edna. "That must be it. Whatever it was, she took off like a shot. I'da ran three feet 'n' got tangled over my own two. But that ain't what I wanted to tell you."

"It's not? Then, what have I been standing here ten minutes in this kitchen waiting for?"

"I think I saw Button Dudley on the way home!" squealed Lou Edna.

"Oh, you did not!" said Hadley. "Stop joshing me. He's stiff as a board on a slab at Bowey Hill. Bill says they haven't released his body yet. 

You were seeing things. You just miscounted on those beers you drank at Sadie's. Too much fun punch does me the same way. It would curl your hair naturally if I told you some of the things I thought I saw when I was tipsy."

"No, Hadley. I only had one," Lou Edna said. "I swear."

Lou Edna swallowed hard. She was obviously upset. The corner of her left eye danced a nervous jig.

"My eyes always jump when I'm too excited," Lou Edna said, touching the corner of the mascara on her eye with her manicured, pink fingernail.

"Take a deep breath. Relax," said Hadley. "Tell me what you saw, Lou Edna."

"I was still shaken about dropping my keys and thinking the booger man was going to get me. I got in my car and started driving. I was trembling like a leaf. Button came right out of nowhere. Like a ghost. It was spooky. Eerie. Totally unexpected, I tell you. It's a wonder I didn't faint dead away right there."

"Well," said Hadley, "there's your explanation. You were still pumping adrenaline and overwrought. You just thought you saw Button. You already said you were expecting to be attacked by the booger man in the dark parking lot behind Sadie's. What you thought you saw was just a product of your overactive imagination."

"No, it wasn't," said Lou Edna.

"Tell me," said Hadley.