Nobody Can Say It's You

21

"Taste this," Hadley said, shoving a glass in front of Maury.

Maury swallowed a swig and started coughing.

"Tastes awful," said Maury. "What is it?"

"Vinegar lemonade," said Hadley. "Must need more sugar."

"Where in the world did you get that recipe?" Maury asked.

"Off the Web," said Hadley. "It's just vinegar and sugar and water. Something the pioneers drank."

"The Donner party ate each other," said Maury, "but that doesn't mean I want to pick somethin' off their menu."

Hadley took a sip behind Maury. She puckered up her lips.

"Or maybe I added too much vinegar. Maybe my glass is too small."

"Maybe you should lay off the old-timey recipes, Sis."

"I was going to try some cornmeal mush, but I've run out of lard."

"Try using olive oil. Not as tasty but twice as healthy."

"Oh, pooh," said Hadley. "I could try some Corn Dodgers if I could remember where I put my Dutch oven."

"If it's in the attic," said Maury, "forget it. That's just too much sugar for a cent to pull those steps down and go off on a gallivant in that dark dungeon."

"It's not as bad as that, Maury," Hadley said. "Are you sure you're not describing your attic?"

"Maybe."

"How 'bout some Black Pudding? All it has in it is eggs, flour, cinnamon, molasses, and a few other spices."

"And vinegar. My throat still feels like it was scalded and left to dry in the hot sun."

"You're just too sensitive. Kid Pie sounds interesting."

"Whose kids are you planning on cooking?"

"Nobody's. It calls for goat. I don't think Pixies stocks goat."

"Nah. Skip's not mentioned that as new items he's had to stock."

"Here's a roast recipe that uses coffee," said Hadley.

"Well," said Maury, "guess I know what Bill and I will be having next week."

"I'll buy a small roast and try it out first," said Hadley, "before I spring it on you and Bill. I can always count on Beanie to help me eat the leftovers. Even if they don't come up to house standards."

"That man is a human garbage disposal," said Maury.

"Good thing," said Hadley. "Keeps good food out of the dump."

"And not so good food," said Maury.

"It's a pretty simple recipe," said Hadley. "Onions and garlic and vinegar. You marinate that for 48 hours and then simmer in the old Dutch Oven in a couple of cups of strong coffee for about six hours."

"Don't hurt yourself rummaging around up there," said Maury.

"I won't," said Hadley. "Who knows? I might uncover another treasure like Harry's video cam up there."

"Or you might break your neck stumbling over old junk," said Maury.

"I'll let you know if the coffee roast is on the menu next week," said Hadley.

"Later, Sis," Maury said.

***

Hadley took some goodies and packed them in her car. She took off down the road toward town, watching as she drove for any sign of her friend, Beanie. She spied him walking down the sidewalk outside of Lou Edna's Beauty Boutique and pulled over to the curb. She leaned over to the passenger side and rolled down the window.