Nobody Can Say It's You

46

"What happened, Lou," Hadley asked, "before all heck broke loose?"

"Well," Lou Edna said, "like I said the place was packed. There were a bunch of kids in their little clique, you know how kids are. I was looking at one of Burke's quilts. I was trying to decide between her Devil's Claw pattern and her Diamond Beauty. Burke does the best needlework, don't you think?"

"Uh-huh," said Hadley.

"The Devil's Claw would go better with the color scheme in my bedroom, but the Diamond Beauty had so many gorgeous colors that I was just at my wit's end trying to decide," Lou Edna said. "I was leaning towards the Diamond Beauty because I been startin' to wonder if my bedroom's needin' a remodelin'. You know, new mattress. Well, if I get a new mattress, I might as well get a new spread and paint the walls a totally different color. That maroon carpet and brown wall color scheme I let Marvis Winchell talk me into down at the hardware store was okay for awhile, but you know how I love pink. I was thinkin' a little Pepto might liven up my love life. I don't know. I only picked that brown swatch when Marvin said it was a virile color.

It looked okay as a one-inch by one-inch swatch, but when I got through painting the walls, they looked something like wet cow manure. I swear that brown has a green tint to it."

"Who did you see down there on that end of the street, Lou Edna," Hadley said, mustering all the patience that Job must have had to use with his friends.

"Oh," said Lou Edna, "I saw Skippy. He's grown into such a good looker, Hadley. Maury better watch out. He'll be bringin' her a new daughter-in-law and a whole slew of grandkids! One of them Elanor twins was there. You know, Chandra is my guess 'cause she, well, you know. Chandra was makin' goo-goo eyes at Skippy. Girl, if I was several decades younger, I would be, too.

And that horrible Orner boy was there, too. Oh, and I saw Estill not too far away from Dougal. Land sakes, that mutt is a handful. But it's Estill's own fault, I say. Spare the rod and all that. Estill's reapin' what she sewed. I heard tell that boy ain't never been told 'no.'"

"I've heard that," said Hadley.

"What was Estill thinkin'? Lettin' a youngin' run wild as a buck all his life. He ain't gonna be worth the price of the bullet to put him out of his misery."

"Uh-huh," said Hadley. "And what happened after you saw those kids?"

"I remember I had just made up my mind to buy the Diamond Beauty, but I wanted to see if I could haggle down the price a little. Burke's been known to drop $10 off if you look pitiful enough.

I heard a ruckus in the woods. I can't tell you what it sounded like. I ain't never heard nuthin' like it in all my born days. A cross between a whoop and a scream, maybe. I don't know.

"Then what happened," said Hadley."