The Quiet One

everything has changed

it had been a couple of days since Oskar died and me and Eli had made a routine with the help of the girls. i hadn't been in training so i won't be playing in the next game. i have been going to watch the girls play but that's about it. i have been write a lot of music and i have been able to write a song which i sing to Eli a lot which seems to calm him down a lot. with my grieving of Oskar i have just been going one day at a time some days are bad some are good but i have been talking to the team counsellor as she helps a lot.

it was match day today and we were traveling down to Sheffield for the semi-finals against Sweden. i was sat on the bus with Eli fast asleep next to me and Demi sat in front of me giving me some tips as she just became a mum not too long ago to a beautiful baby boy.

"so, I've heard you singing a lot what song is it never heard of it before" Millie said to me

"i actually wrote that song yeh helps with Eli he loves music" i said.

"You write songs" she said shocked.

"Yeh i have been writing since i was 16 got about 10 songs in the bag" i said.

"Can we hear" Rachel said now all the girls listening.

"Yeh i have them saved on my phone this is my newest that i have been writing this week i haven't finished it I'm going to add some piano into it " i said and i played it.

You were a phonograph, I was a kid
I sat with an ear close, just listening
I was there when the rain tapped her way down you face
You were a miracle I was just holding your space

Well time has a way of throwing it all in your face
The past, she is haunted, the future is laced
Heartbreak, you know, drives a big black car
Swear I was in the back seat, just minding my own

And through the glass, the corn crows come like rain
They won't stay, they won't stay
For too long now

This could be all that we know
Of love and all

Well you were a dancer and I was a rag
The song in my head, well was all that I had
Hope was a letter I never could send
Well love was a country we couldn't defend

And through the carnival we watch them go round and round
All we knew of home was just a sunset and some clowns

Well you were a magazine, I was a plain jane
Just walking the sidewalks all covered in rain
Love to just get into some of your stories
Me and all of my plain jane glory
Just me and all of my plain jane glory

after the song finished the girl were in aww.

"That was so good Jae you need to put that on Spotify what about your other songs" she said.

"i mean there all the same quite instrumental songs but I've never thought about posting it online" i said.

"You have a good voice you need to share this it would be amazing" Jill said and all the girls agreed.

"Yeh maybe i should maybe around Christmas a little Christmas gift and some of them are covers of songs" i said.

"You need to put them out send them to us and we can listen" Rachel said.

"Okay but it doesn't go beyond us got it" i said and they nodded.

"alright" i said and i sent it to them.

for the rest of the ride everyone was quiet as they listened to me singing and i was looking out the window looking out the window listening to Spotify and watching Eli sleep. during the trip he woke up once or twice but wasn't a major issue.

we parked up and we all walked out i was the last one of, as i was putting Eli in a carrier to make it easier. when i walked of media was there filming me. i walked in and walked into the changing rooms and i was wanted with Sarina for the post-match interview. Leah happily took Eli and we both walked in.