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CHAPTER 2

She was here. In a place I never imagined us visiting in my life. A psychiatric ward. According to the neurologist, the brain scan showed that her frontal lobe and temporal lobe did not have a lesser gray matter volume. Some medical stuff. Simply put, from her brain scan, she was perfectly okay and had no other signs showing the possibility of schizophrenia.

“ I don’t understand Doc, is it possible that the scan came out wrong?” I said looking at the brain scan on the computer. Truthfully, I didn’t understand what I was looking at, I didn’t know if there was any abnormality or not but doctors know best I guess.

“ I’m afraid not sir. Looking at the brain image, I can not finalize the diagnosis but, how about we keep her for at least a month to examine more and see if she shows other main symptoms” he replied.

“ Sure Doc, as far as she gets better” I said as a stood up and shook his hand.
Leaving the office, I met mum sitting with other ladies conversing. She looked at ease. It had probably been a while since she saw people her age. Maybe admitting her wasn’t going to be a bad idea right? I thought to myself. The hospital would have good and adequate equipments and everything necessary to help her.

“ Hey mama, made new friends I see” I said as I sat down beside her .

“ Kai honey, this is Sandra, Bethel and Diane” she explained as she pointed at each of them introducing them.

“ And this is my son Kai, he’s in the FBI” she completed proudly. I was nowhere close to the level of being in the FBI, but if that’s how she saw me, I was going to leave it that way.

“ Nice to meet you all” I said briefly with a smile.

“ Come on mama, we need to check you into your room".Helping her up, I led her towards the row of rooms and assisted her into an empty one.

“ I’ll be right back mama” I told her as I sat her down on one of the chairs.

I hurriedly went to the reception and asked that all the payments should be sent directly to me and to avoid talking about any money or payment to my mother. She needed all the strength she could get in order to recover. After the room registration was complete, she was assigned a personal care taker. Her name was Margret.

“ Mama, this is Miss Margaret, she’ll be with you for the time being okay? You have nothing to worry about” I said smiling at her. At this point, she was already lying down on her bed with the remote control on the hand. At least she wasn’t uncomfortable.

“ Okay baby, I’ll be fine. Just take care of yourself okay? You don’t need to stay here any longer. You’ve already missed few months of school right?” she asked as she skipped the channels that didn’t get attention.

“ Yes mama, but don’t worry, I’ll be fine. You trust me right” I replied as I sat down on her bed to give her a peck.

“ Of course I do, you’re my son after all” she said with a chuckle.
And that was the last conversation we ever had.

After I went back to new York, I was drowned with school work. Before I was done with class and got back to my hostel to call home, Margaret would tell me that mama was already asleep. Once in a while, she would take a picture of my mum and send it to me. Or make a video of my mum saying hello to me. Those little things kept me sane till I finally graduated. Everything was finally getting better. Or not.

The day after my graduation, I was already booking a ticket back home. I needed to show my mother that all her hopes finally came true. I needed to thank her for all the efforts she put in order for me to be where I was.
Once I landed, I didn’t even get home to drop my luggage, I took a cab and rushed to the hospital. I couldn’t wait another minute without seeing her. Inside a taxi, I got a call from aunty Margaret. Years being with mum had made her a part of the family. Someone that I could count on.

“ Hey Aunty!  you have good intuitions, how did you know I was back?” I said happily.

“Kai! we need you, it’s mum” she replied as her voice broke. As she said those words, my smile fell.

“ Is she-” before I could complete my sentence, the call ended. I couldn’t breathe, sweat from nowhere began to appear on my skin. I became restless.

“ Sir, please can you drive faster” I alerted the driver. Thankfully he did, leaving me to say prayers to heaven.
She was gone. My mother was gone. I could feel it. Using my last energy, I climbed out of the taxi and began to run towards the hospital entrance. I look crazy, a backpack on my shoulder, tears running down my face. Once I got to the reception, I saw nurse Theo rubbing his hands down his face sighing.

“ T? Where’s mum” I asked moving towards him. Once he heard my voice, he turned his head towards me then froze.

“ Kai, mum-” then the crying started. He walked briskly towards me and embraced me tightly. That’s when I lost it. It was true. I couldn’t say goodbye to her. When she needed me the most, I wasn’t there for her. Theo and I cried together in the waiting room for over twenty minutes. At least I wasn’t alone, I had a family now; Theo became a best friend and a big brother to me. Aunty Mag became an aunty. Even the doctors, cared about us. As we were sitting together, A doctor wearing a nose mask approached us.

“ Excuse me sir, Please may I speak to you for a moment?” he addressed me as he nodded to Theo.

“ I’ll be right be, give me a second” I said to Theo as I gave his hand a brief squeeze.

“ Firstly, I’d like to say sorry for your loss” the doctor said as we walked towards the staircase.

“ What happened to her? She was getting better wasn’t she?” I asked running my hand through my hair.

“ She was, but unfortunately there was an incident yesterday” he continued as he stopped walking.

That statement made my ears perk up. Incident? What sort of incident could it be that caused her death.

“ What sort of incident Doc?” I asked turning towards him as he hesitated.
Here I was standing in front of an open door. Inside, there was a table at the middle, with someone lying on top. After the doctor and I spoke, he asked if I was mentally ready to see my mother. Of course I wasn’t, but I needed to see her. Maybe if I stood beside her, she would know that I was back home and wake up. Stupid right?.

Dragging myself towards the table, memories of my mother and I began to flow. Her making breakfast the first day I entered the academy, her laughter when I told her how I couldn’t climb the ropes in my training classes, her encouraging words, her hugs, her pecks, her smell. They were all memories now because my mother was here. On this table, not breathing, not calling my name, just there. Looking closely at her, she looked asleep. Maybe she was.

“ Mama” I called out.

“ Mama, it’s me Kai”

“ I’m back home, I’m here to see you”

“ I can finally join the FBI now mama”I said as I held her hand. She was cold.

“ Wake up mama, please! I need you” I cried out as my legs failed. Then I cried. I cried because my whole life was revolved out her. She was the only reason I worked hard. Now she was gone.

Gone because of a stupid mistake. How can someone make such mistake? An overdose of Methohexital?, A sedative? Really?. My mother was gone because a nurse misunderstood an instruction from the doctor in charge?. I couldn’t even get angry, I was exhausted. Even if I sued anyone to court, it won’t bring her back. She was gone forever.

Looking back at her, I cleaned my eyes. She won’t want me to break down like this. She would have wanted me to live an honest life and make her proud.

“ I’ll make your proud mama, I love you so much” I said finally as I stood up and kissed her on her forehead.