To Find Something True

※ twenty-four

“Can I trust you?” was the question her boss gave her.

She blinked. Hoseok seemed to have a strong reason for ignoring all the scolding and warnings from the older colleagues. Personal. She knew it was personal. “If it’s something you’re uncomfortable to share, you don’t have to–”

“Can I trust you?” A press in his word. It was as if he knew he could trust her, but he hesitated. “Yoongi picked you to be my P.A and I decided to trust him,” he said. “Maybe by opening myself little by little can help you understand me. You don’t have to refer to whatever Seokjin or Yoongi assume.”

She realized that was the first time she heard her boss talking without stuttering or hesitating. Yet, short sentences were still there. Softness danced in her tone as she said, “you can trust me.”

Redness from the traffic light shed onto their skin as the car slowed down, and stop. A few cars and a bus passed by in front of them, but what caught her eyes was the tension on her boss' shoulders relaxed.

"I want to punish my sister," he said, in the middle of a wincing noise from a lone bus that stopped beside them. “For disappearing. Only left a note. Left me with the boutique. She left me with everything she had made me take care of. And for leaving me alone.”

It was because of her sister. But sadness wasn’t the only reason. Anger, disappointment, frustration weighed in the air. She noticed his eyes glimmered under the shine of red, that soon flickered to green. The driver carried his foot off the brake pedal, accelerating the car forward.

“My family hasn't been the same since she left. My parents haven’t been the same.” Heavy silence hung in the air. “Everything, after she left, swallowed me whole. Everything. The day she left –” he shook his head “– everything didn’t sit well with me.”

“Do you know where she’s gone?”

“No,” he said. “She only left a note telling us to leave her boutique to me. No contact or letter. Not even an update from her online. We keep waiting.” His Adam apple bobbed.

His eyes ran to the GPS to check the direction. The car slowed down, realizing they almost arrived. 

Jiah had been waiting for her mother too. Thus, she was able to relate to the pain of longing for loved ones who were far away. Not even waiting for an update from the country’s precinct helped. She understood. So well understood the pain of waiting.

“The hyungs and Amber must have thought I wear hoodies all the time because… I'm upset my sister hasn’t returned, don’t they?” The question flicked Jiah’s gaze to him. “Yet, they didn’t try questioning for the deeper reasons why.”

“I don’t think they’re only worried about your hoodies,” she said. Creaking noises from the brake pedal as Hoseok parked the car in front of a barber shop. He then turned to look at her with eyebrows raised. She added, “Seokjin told me, you haven’t been yourself.”

“Did he?”

Jiah nodded her head. “When I bought us Tiramisu, he told me that’s your favorite. That was why I rushed out to get another one in case you want more. I figured things have been hard for you and then, I found something small that could make you happy. Seeing you enjoy Tiramisu that time motivated me to be a good assistant.”

Silence as they held their gazes. Jiah wondered what he was thinking the moment she told him that.

She continued, “Seokjin told me a lot. Yoongi, Amber and Seokjin really care about you. You are their best friend’s brother so, you’re their brother too. Seokjin also said, they’re trying their best to care for you just like your sister used to do. They don’t need to wait for you to ask –” She pursed her lips into a thin line, humming. “Ah! He even joked that he wished to look like your sister so that you’ll listen to him.”