Always and Forever

Grief

Regina's POV

It's been a month since Robin's death. They say as time goes by, it will hurt less and less. Yet, somehow, I'm still suffering from his loss. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't think. I just hurt. Every day I continue to lack the desire to get up and go out. So instead, I stay home, do work, and then wallow. The pattern repeats itself each day. 

*knocking on the door*

"Regina, open up."

*knock continues*

"Come on, Regina. I know you're in there."

"Go away, Ms. Swan."

"I'm not leaving, Regina. You might as well open the door before I have to break it down."

*Regina opens up the door and walks back to her room*

Emma's POV

I stand there in shock, surprised that she actually opened the door. For a month now I've been knocking on her door hoping that she would let me in. Maybe she's finally ready to take a step forward. I walk up the stairs to her bedroom to find her back in bed. I've never seen her look so small, fragile and worn down. It seems like she's lost some weight, too. 

"I brought you some food. There's soup and a kale salad."

"Thank you, but I'm not hungry."

"Come on, Regina. Please just eat a little bit."

"Shouldn't you be with Captain Guyliner, right now?"

"I'm right where I should be."

"Ms. Swan, what will it take for you to go away."

"If you eat, maybe I'll go."

"I guess it's worth a shot. Let's go, Ms. Swan."

"Thank you."

We head down the stairs and into the kitchen. I watch her carefully as she takes out a bowl for the soup. I pour some soup in the bowl for her and take it to the dining table. I grab a plate for me to eat my grilled cheese on.

"Is that what you call a lunch, Ms. Swan?"

"It's food from the Gods, Madame Mayor. You should try it."

"I would do no such thing, Ms. Swan. You eat like a child."

We sit and eat in a comfortable silence. 

Regina's POV

After we finish eating, Emma gets up, washes our dishes and puts it all away. 

"Alright, Madam Mayor, I guess I'll get going now as promised. Everything is now cleaned and packed away."

The thought of Emma leaving, starts to bring back the sadness. I've been reluctant to go out in public, or have anyone over, but this meal was a nice distraction. For a moment, my focus was elsewhere.

"Emma, wait."

"Regina, are you okay?"

"I just wanted to thank you, for bringing me lunch. I know I've been ignoring you and everyone else, but I do appreciate this."

"You never have to thank me, Regina. I'm always here for you, if you'll allow me to be."

"It. It just hasn't been easy, Emma."

"How about, I stay?"

"Excuse me?"

"You don't need to be alone, Regina. I can stay with you for a little if you'd like. We can sit in silence, or we can talk. Whatever you feel like doing."

"I suppose that doesn't sound like a horrid idea."

"Great, what would you like to do."

She follows me to the living room, where I light the fireplace, pour us both a glass of Apple Cider and we take a seat on the couch.

"So Swan, tell me, what have you and the handless wonder been up to."

"Is this really what you want to talk about, Regina?"

"Matter of fact, it is."

"Nothing, at all."

"Trouble in paradise, Ms. Swan?"

"No, we've just been busy."

"Take it from me, Ms. Swan, time is never guaranteed. You should spend your time with him wisely."

I chug my glass of Cider quickly and pour another one. This all just seems very unfair. I have tried to be good. I continue to do good. Yet, somehow, It's as if I'm still being punished. The amount of times I've had to fight for my happiness, to then just lose it, becomes more and more maddening. I chug my glass and pour another drink again.

"Regina, you should probably slow down."

"I'm fine, Ms. Swan."

Emma gets up from her seat quickly, takes my glass from me and she puts it onto the mantle.

"What the hell are you doing, Ms. Swan".

"Gina, you don't need this. You've had enough"

She's never called me Gina before, where did that come from? Before I could gather my thoughts, I'm being pulled into a hug. I can't think anymore, my body betrays me and I hold onto her, and I've lost all control of my emotions. I begin to cry.