The Knives of My Mind

" You make me happier. "

I never thought I was going to be able to happy again without her and you showed me it was possible.
She was toxic, pained me, and I noticed it when my best friend pointed it out, you did the impossible.
I thought I had drawn a line, something no one could pass, but apparently it was still crossable.
Within one day, you had me wrapped in your texts, your personality, you. My feelings for you are unstoppable.
I thought I had shut down, never to let anyone else in for a while, and you broke that so easily. You're phenomenal.

You brought back the smile I had lost for a while, made me smile when I was spiraling into deep despair. How?
Despite me saying I'd never fall for someone so easily again, that it was something I told myself not to allow.
And now I feel so lost, so empty, having nothing to do when you leave. I love our chats and everything throughout.
And despite everything my best friend told me, "Don't fall for him!" It was too late, for you I had fallen... no doubt.
You make me giggle so much, us perfectly intertwining with each other. Because with you, I can be loud.

I wanted to shut off everything I had known, everything I thought I could feel other than laughter in order to not fall.
Why I felt I needed to this I don't quite recall. But spending time with you is so amazing it feels surreal.
You are the one that I've wanted to find for so long. You were the one who shot down those protections, those walls.
For no matter the time we had away, I always missed you. Even for three minutes on sleep calls.
You embody perfectly all the good things I wanted, the cuteness of everything. For when I was blessed with you, I was appalled.

I can't wait to spend even more time with you for when we are together, you make me happy. I've found what I lost.
We joke about dating, and I love that. However, if it did end up being more, I must tell you, my heart comes at a cost.
For something like that I need time for, time to heal from the past, for that's a line that cannot be crossed.
For what we have is something that is unforgettable. The way we're like the same person, and you're so soft...
"He's the one, he's gonna help me through my healing process" I had thought.

I don't ever want to lose you, I've become so believably attached to you from the first day, tell me you feel the same.
What I'm saying is true, it is not a game. I swear what I'm saying is a promise and it's something I will say with no shame.
You are the one in which I have fallen for. You used the one thing to get to my heart immediately. Music. And for this I take the blame.
For what you do to me is insane, you've lit something inside me and I want to see it to the end, an undying flame.
For you had helped me find something I thought I could never find, and now with you, my feel