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DEE

My hand jumps to my wrist, covering it. My lips are moving, but I have no words for the man that's staring furiously, or the others that are shocked.

"I didn't... I didn't..."

I didn't know Ranrok noticed the cuts! Is that why he is so adamant to stick around, because he thinks I've been hurting myself and Vadnar wasn't aware of the danger?

The men clear their throats, whistle, and mutter as they excuse themselves. Even Ranrok senses he has pushed too far, because he stands to leave. He lingers behind me for a second, his shadow dwarfing me.

"Go or she won't be the only one with cuts," Vadnar growls.

A long sigh, full of disappointment and resentment, comes from Ranrok. But he disappears into the darkness, and Vadnar steps closer to kneel before me.

The face I sat on last night is now looking at me with a fierce expression.

"Let me see," he says and shakes his head in disbelief. "Why, Dee?"

"I didn't cut myself," I blurt.

I can't lie to him, because he would see I'm right through me. But telling him the truth is just too painful.

"I thought we were past the secrets," he says, his fist squeezing a handful of sand so hard I can hear it crack.

"Why do I keep failing you even now?" He looks hurt. The anger is changing to something scarier.

"It's my friend, Cherry," I whisper, on the verge of tears.

I pull my hair, wanting to escape my body and this fucking situation. I don't want to tell him the truth. I don't want it to be the truth. I miss Cherry and home, but I don't want to return! I want to stay here and now, with Vadnar.

"She's a scientist like I am," I sniffle as I untie the bandana and reveal my wrist. "She wrote me a message that she's bringing me home."

The cuts are nearly healed. The scabs have shrunk and fallen off, but there are faint white lines where the letters had been carved.

Vadnar clutches my wrist, his expression now confused. "But how? Why?"

"I was teleported here by accident. She must be trying to take me home."

He nods. "We will tell her you are in no need of rescue, then. Do not worry. Sending this message will be my priority until–"

I cup his face, a tear streaking down my cheek. He is such a powerful warrior, but his tender love is unmistakable. He has been through so much but refuses to rest. He keeps on trying to change the world; to change fate. I don't know if Vadnar will become king one day, or if I'll be taken to Earth and never see him again, but one thing is certain: I will never forget this man.

"I can't stop this. I can't communicate with Cherry."

He loses it, retching himself away as he stands up and paces. "But there must be a way!"

"I'm sorry," I sob, my chest feeling like it's going to burst.

"And what was that last night?" he rages, extending a hand like he wants an explanation. "You pretended like everything was fine. You let me–" he grits his teeth and turns away, running to the nearest tree and pounding into it with bare fists. The loud thuds echo through the night, and he is so lost in his rage that he forgets the danger around us.

I cover my hands with my face and cry into them, unable to watch him destroy himself.

He's right. I pretended everything was fine. I kept my mouth shut to relieve him of an additional nightmare. And I don't regret it, because the pleasure we shared in the ocean last night was true freedom. He was happy; finally. He didn't have to worry about me being taken away.

If only that safe fantasy could have survived a few more nights.

Vadnar returns to my side, panting and with bleeding fists. The tree he pounded is leaning against another, defeated.

"I did not mean to yell at you," he says as he returns to kneeling in front of me. He looks exhausted; a man drained of a soul. But he still lifts a bloody hand to cup my teary face. "Don't cry, Dee. I will figure it out. I will clutch onto you if I have to, but we will not be separated."

"I don't want to keep more secrets," I whimper, leaning my face into his hand.

"It's not your fault," he says, coming up to embrace me. "Not your fault."

Maybe this would be easier if we hadn't found love. But we did, and it's an addicting monster.

Once I calm down, I dab at Vadnar's bloody knuckles with the bandana. We don't say another word.

– • –

The guys plan how they're going to overtake the farm. There are dozens of masters there, and Vadnar hopes that some of them will join our group to expand it.

Vaine is instructed to guard me as they execute the plan. Hull volunteered, but Vadnar doesn't fully trust him yet.

We plan to attack in two days. In the meantime, the men will study the guard switch schedule. It's a simple plan. Sneak into the barracks, kill the guard and arm the masters inside. Then, everyone charges out to free the rest of the camp.

I will hold my breath the entire time I'm hiding with Vaine. We will be a safe distance away, tucked into the hollow at the base of a tree with enough food and water to last four days in case the group doesn't return. But I will be drowning in anxiety the entire time.

Vadnar is distant. He checks in on me every few hours, ensuring I don't need anything. But his touches are brief and his expression... professional. I understand that he needs time to process it all. Still, I can't help but miss him.

For the third night, he gets little sleep as he takes the longest patrolling shift all by himself. He still stands tall, his muscular body ready for any battle. His bruised fists don't keep him from carrying logs of wood around or sharpening spears and daggers. My own body can't help but tingle at the memory of how those biceps and shoulders of his held me up as his mouth devoured me.

But sex is the last thing on our schedules. There is too much to do.

I've been braiding rope with the thin fibers the men pulled from trees and other little things to help them prepare for their mission.

We're all focused. There hasn't been much laughter today. Even Vaine is quieter than usual, and I suspect this isn't only about the mission. Vadnar never corrected Ranrok, so the group probably believes that I did cut myself. I'm not sure why he's keeping quiet about it, but it doesn't matter.

The focus is on the mission. The guys will be successful and return with the new masters. They have to make it.

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