Dhadkan (Book 1 - Singhania Brothers)

Part 21 : Trust

Arnav was trying to work but he couldn't. His mind was preoccupied with disturbing thoughts. He got up from his chair, shutting his laptop and opened the french windows to let the air in. He tried to make himself understand that Ayaansh was not used to sharing his problems. His childhood had been lost to his fears and insecurities that still prevailed.

Arnav wasn't angry, he was just disappointed. Ayaansh had been going through so much in school and he didn't have any clue. The boy had already been ignored a lot, Arnav felt guilty of adding his own name to the list. He should have known what was happening with his brother. But then Ayaansh didn't tell him either! It hurt that the boy still wasn't ready to share his problems. Arnav swallowed his hurt and told himself that it was upto him to assure Ayaansh he could come to him anytime no matter what. It was him who had failed to do so.

Ayaansh mustered up the courage and stepped inside the study to find his brother staring out at the sky, standing near the windows. Ayaansh gathered himself and hugged Arnav from behind. Arnav was startled when he felt the pair of arms around him. He wasn't expecting Ayaansh to come.

Ayaansh was half expecting to be shoved away but was surprised when Arnav turned, crouched down before him and pulled him back in his embrace. Ayaansh pressed himself to his chest.

Arnav rubbed his back. "I'm sorry, bachcha."

Ayaansh pulled back. "Aap kyun sorry bol rhe ho, Bhaiya? Sorry toh mujhe kehna chahiye..." His voice choked.

"I'm sorry for making you feel that couldn't come to me with your problems." Ayaansh opened his mouth to protest but Arnav didn't let him. "I know I've been busy. Mujhe jyada time nhi mila to make sure you were not having any issues at school. Mujhe dhyaan rakhna chahiye tha..."

Ayaansh shook his head helplessly. What was his brother saying? Arnav had made sure to ask him several times about his school. There was nothing for him to feel guilty for.

"... I promise I'll make sure aage se aisa kuch na ho. I've talked to their parents. They will never try to bully you again."

"Galti meri hai na, Bhaiya, aap kyun sorry keh rhe ho?" Ayaansh's eyes filled up. "Naraaz ho aap mujhse?"

Arnav shook his head. He wasn't angry at him. His anger had calmed down but that only made way for his hurt.

"I'm sorry, Bhaiya, mujhe aapko bata dena chahiye tha... Mai bas.." Ayaansh trailed off. He still didn't know how to tell him.

Arnav cupped his face gently. "Mai wajah nhi puchunga, tujhe jitna time lena hai le le, bachcha. I'll wait for you to come to me."

Ayaansh looked down. Arnav's understanding was unnerving him. He could feel the traces of hurt in his Bhaiya's voice. He didn't know how to voice out his feelings.

Arnav saw the sadness on his face. "Mai naraaz nhi hoon, Ayu."

"Upset ho, I know." Ayaansh whispered, more to himself than to Arnav.

Arnav sighed and stood up. "Chal drive par chalte hai."

"Kya?" Ayaansh asked confused.

"Drive par. Get your jacket." Arnav said and walked out without waiting for a reply.

Ayaansh was confused but got his jacket from his room and rushed out where Arnav was waiting for him in the car. Arnav drove off. Ayaansh was silent during the whole ride. Neither did he look up from his shoes, nor did he speak a word. Arnav let him be.

Ayaansh looked around when Arnav stopped the car. It was the same place where they had come before. Sunset point! He came out when he saw his brother walking towards the cliff. He followed Arnav and sat down beside him when Arnav sat on the edge of cliff.