FILTHY INFATUATION [KTH]

37. FILTHY INFATUATION

Past.

37| "Burning confessions."

T

AEHYUNG'S POV

If my eyes could separate the flesh from bodies, Ji-hoon would be a bloody mess on the fucking ground. And I would have enjoyed watching him suffer with my hands full of popcorn. No jokes about that. The inevitable jiffy of rage was pulsating in my veins, coiling around my bones and exploding lethal ideas in my head. I was this close, grabbing Ji-hoon by the collar and slamming his head on the locker until he became one of them. It was so hard to keep the violence at bay.

Because right now Nina was coming toward me, not really. She was reaching her locker and as usual, the serpent Ji-hoon was walking beside her. And like usual she looked so adorably delectable with the red hoodie, fishnet stockings underneath that short skirt, and the black ribbon tied around her ponytail. And when she bat her lashes like a little tease, she looked so fucking biteable— huh? What? Biting is an acceptable form of sappy appreciation. Feel free to judge me. 

"I realize some humans are a complete waste on this earth, I should annihilate them." I clenched my fist, tossing a short glance at grinning Ji-hoon. Jungkook grunted out a low laugh of dry amusement.

The asphyxiating feeling I had ever since Nina left me standing in the hallway turned from bad to fucking fatal. Still, I couldn't get over how she burst into tears, how she regretted saving me that day. It should have pleased the sadistic side of me, I was her custom-made hell after all. However, this time it hurt as if someone had slashed a part of me, ripped it into pieces, and stomped all over the remains. Not wanting to do anything from her was always a white lie. Wanting to hurt was a lie too. If I wasn't such a self-loathed, selfish bastard I wouldn't drag her into the pit of this misery. The guilt had manifested into something bigger and sharper, digging in my veins when I simply dared to breathe.

"Such brutal thoughts. You should try to keep a positive attitude even though it's hard as hell." Says the one who couldn't handle the breakup and drowned himself in alcohol, appearing perfectly wasted with a hint of devilishness.

"I don't think I'm capable of producing positive energy when I wanna squeeze someone's unnecessary existence under my boots." Jungkook chuckled at my hissing response as he shortly glanced at Ji-hoon and Nina.

We saw it all, how Ji-hoon purposely moved closer to her so his shoulder could touch hers, how he leaned extra closer to her ear. My Nina's ear. There was no way I would avoid their sheepish interaction. Impossible. I didn't avoid anything when it came to her. Seeing her close to Ji-hoon crippled my inside, lurched my stomach with hostile energy.

Watching her playing basketball or sliding in his car after school or just simply witnessing her laughing at his antics as if he was the funniest asshole walking in this world boiled my blood to the point where it could burst out of the seams and spill all over the floor… It was unsettling how poorly I envied that bastard— He could hear the sound of her laughter, that sweet and honeyed sound that belonged to me.

"How's your mom doing now? She was pretty sick back then." Nina's eyes clashed with mine then swiftly looked back at that loser. I was leaning against the lockers, ones that were close to hers so I could scrutinize them closely like a creep that I was for her. Jungkook said something about the basketball game and the team meeting on the court but his voice came across as distant in my senses because my whole focus was punctured on them.