peter parker/tom holland imagines

all you had to do was stay | t.h.

tw: mentions of unprescribed pills and angst. mild cursing- but like, that's in all my imagines... do i still need to put that as a warning? i'm not really sure if i'm great at writing sad stuff like this, so please lemme know if there's anything i can change or make better. as long as it's constructive criticism. (1.6k+ words).

also, this song is "for taylor," and all the credit goes to liv. i do not own this song! disclaimer: not all the lyrics are listed/in order.

it was weird, you had decided, but not really. maybe somewhere deep down you had known it wasn't going to last forever. in fact, you were slightly surprised it had lasted for as long as it did.

one year, ten months, and thirteen days.

that's when he decided you just weren't good enough for him, that you weren't exciting, special, or particularly intriguing. that's how long it took. the saddest part? you were already planning something special for the two year anniversary.

four months and two days.

that's how long it's been since he's left. since you've gotten any decent sleep, eaten a good meal, or even genuinely smiled. since he broke your heart and took some of the pieces with him, and if you didn't have all the parts, how were you supposed to put it back together?

looking back in hindsight, you hadn't seen it coming. every "i love you" he uttered, you thought was true. you believed it and kept it close to your heart, as if those words were the only things keeping you going.

tell me why
i thought we were happy
i felt the sparks fly

standing there in the empty park, you let the tears cascade down your cheeks, grateful that there wasn't anyone there. it was the same place he tried to let you down softly, telling you that it simply wasn't working. something about clashing schedules. bullshit.

the second he said the words "break up," it was like everything stopped. as if the hands of time themselves didn't know what to do with the world, and so froze there delicately. he had been odd the last couple of days, and you were so stupidly naive to think he may have been proposing to you. it made so much sense to you, the picnic date, stuttering, tripping over his words.

it burned your insides, like whatever was left of your heart was on fire, and there was that funny feeling in your stomach. not the feeling you got when you used to think of him, because those were light and airy butterflies. these were angry t-rexes, rampaging around. it felt like crushed, sharp pieces of glass were scratching your throat, with every breath you took.

everything hurt to do, and even the smallest things reminded you of him.

but now I'm right where
you left me
i felt it babe like midnight rain
our love story began to change

you exhaled through your nose, trying to calm down. your head was pounding and all you wanted to do was sleep. but no amount of unprescribed sleeping pills would push away the intrusive thoughts that poked at your head, constantly reminding you of what the two of you could have been.

it wasn't like you didn't try to make time for tom.

because you did. so much. was it fair to pin it all on yourself? or were the clashing schedules just an excuse for something else? maybe he found someone else. someone better.

at work, perhaps. a pretty actress, one with long legs, beautiful hair, deep eyes, and clear skin. someone who could make him laugh relentlessly, and never gave him a hard time. they didn't fight, or disagree, and had the same movie preference. the two would share playlists or songs, and of course they'd share aux. they would cuddle at night, and whisper sweet nothings to each other before falling asleep, intertwined together. and best of all, they'd never have to worry about making time for each other because they would be on set together so much.