Rosewood Institute

The Fabric of Our Souls

Birch's POV

I sat in my room, clutching the time capsule box Iris and I made all those years ago. I was seven when we made that box, it was an old wooden box we found in a shed behind father's house.

Opening it, I smiled at the worn drawings we made and the little trinkets we left in there. Tears fall down my face as I brush my fingers on the lock of hair we tried, and failed to braid together.

I pull out everything from the box and lay everything out on my bed. I was alone right now, finally out of my headspace for what seems to be the first time in forever.

Nobody really prepared me for me being so dependent on others during that time, it was scary having to trust others like that but I trust everyone here implicitly.

Trust.

Such a scary word and feeling, at anytime my trust could be broken, a small part if me still questions why I'm here and why I trust everyone here so much.

Trust, hard earned but so easy to lose.

I can feel myself crying, I know I'm sad and depressed a part of me just wants to be with Iris, no more pain and suffering.

But I know I'm safe here.

Safe, that word was once so foreign but now rolls off my tongue like an old friend saying hello.

I curiously pulled out a letter addressed to me, the handwriting was crude and looked like a child's handwriting, but we were children when she wrote this, so that made sense to me.

I knew it had to be from Iris, she was the only one who had access to the box except from me.

As I opened the letter, a pressed flower fell in my lap. As I picked it up, it was a dandelion. I smiled thinking about the last time I saw one, how they always reminded me of her.

I then opened the letter, slowly processing her words and trying to read through the tear marks on the page. I was still sad that I lost my twin, but I now know I couldn't change what happened to her, to us. We were only kids trying to survive that nightmare; I only hope that one day I can say I'm past that pain, but right now I'm still processing, and that's okay.

I know now it's okay to take my time and actually be able to think for myself and not just take orders from father.

Tears ran down my face as I read her letter, once I was done I held it close to my heart. It's like I could feel her, that I could feel her love through her words on the page and it gave me peace feeling that.

The letter:
Birch, I need you to do something for me.
I need you to let me go.
You have to let me go in order to finally start healing.
In another life, maybe it was just you and me.
Maybe there we could just love each other, right?
Be happy running through flower fields and finally seeing the ocean like you've always wanted.
Maybe we could even meet our soulmates one day.
I can see it, us being happy together.
Those dreams, they feel like moments in real time. They feel so real to me, those are the things I think about as father teaches you his lessons.
They help me block out the pain your feeling, the pain I wish I could take from you.
I tried in the beginning to fight father off, but as I got sicker and weaker I couldn't do much more then to cry, for you, for us, and for the family that never was.
Maybe in that life, we'd do all the things we said we would, But we got this one instead.
You are my twin, my best friend, and my better half. I know you'll miss me for the rest of your life, but I hope you can one day look back on this moment and only be happy that you had a twin, a sister.
One day I will be a stranger to you, only living in your distant memory.
But you've always been the center of all of my favorite memories.
The first time you ate an apple and got the juice all over you, the first time we found an old picture of our mother and we both cried on how much we look like her, or the first time we stargazed all night.
I hope one day you can forgive me for not getting us out of this hellhole sooner.
My biggest regret among many, is that I never got to properly meet our mother.
I can only hope that you meet your soulmates and are forever happy with them.

Much love,
Iris

I wiped the tears off my face and placed the letter back in our box, I wanted this to stay between us. I know eventually I'll have to show the box to Mr.Silas, but right now I need this privacy, this separation.

I feel like I've been too dependent on him, like I'm a burden. I know I'm not, but I always have this feeling in the back of my mind like I need to be better and have more independence.

I laid back down in my bed, and covered myself with my thick blanket, it gave me comfort feeling the softness on my skin.

I was so exhausted, I fell asleep in minutes.