Seventeen

Chapter Twenty-nine

  * Three days later *

    Harry's P.O.V

       I sit blankly staring at my hands. My foots tapping as I stare. The cross on my hand the only piece of faith I have. My fingers feeling numb. One more time I'll have to see this bastard then Ciara and I can start a new chapter. I look up at the clock reading off ( 11:00 ) I've been on call for three days and I can't wait to be home. I don't want to stay here. I recall my annoyance at Adam when he told me we had to drive all the way to Doncaster as the doctors would me for his evaluation. I told her a few hours,but hours turn into days. I hated long rides,but it was the only way to clean up this mess of mine and finally rid him of my life. Besides the annoyance it's been three days and I haven't heard her voice. I've called and called,but it's always Gloria who picks up notifying me that she's been sleeping the days and nights away. I wish I could do that be with her to hold her as she falls asleep. I still remember our nights I'd just stare at her as her chest rose up and down, her lips parted softly and her fingers laced in mine. I miss her, all of her. She consumes my thoughts long enough that I don't notice the door creak open. 

  " Mr.Styles a pleasure to see you once more,'' Dr. Montgomery politely says extending his hand to shake,'' I recall this will be your last visit here and you'll be returning home." I nod head.

 " Yes, I will be back in Holmes by tonight so I will see him one last time,'' I repeat almost irritated. I can't wait to move on. 

  " Well today he's been heavily medicated,but he's lucid,'' he informs me and I laugh. I touch my jaw still feeling the pain from the first visit. 

  " Well okay just as long as he's restrained like I asked the nurse and also I'd like to see his son before I head home,'' I look up to see his eyes have widen.

  " You really want to see Tyler,'' he says almost enlightened. I nod my head.

   " But, of course,'' he says again politely before I hear a beep come from his pocket. He pulls out a pager and a little red light is flashing,'' they've brought him up. Ready Mr.Styles?''

  I look down at my hands again, staring at the cross for a moment. One more time and I nod. One last time and I'm free.

_________________________________________

  " Ciara are you sure? He's worried,'' Gloria scolds as she tries to hand me the phone. Since he left I keep thinking about his words " we can start over'' it's not that simple as he said it. My thoughts, Gloria's back and forth advice and thirty-four missed calls to count. The excuse every single time is that I'm asleep, but that is far from truth and Gloria is my evidence.

    Two days and no sleep. Today including. The pills worked,but they don't last through my dreams, the night terrors. I scream and scream and she's there to comfort me. Every minute it's a different scenario either I'm with Harry and for some reason he's pulled away or I'm in that room still in her clothes. The night sweats, the screaming, the anguish, the guilt of leading Harry onto a life that we can't have until I'm better, until I'm me again. 

   I look up and her eyes are like two orbs filled with worry.

 " Ciara he's coming back tonight. What do you want me to do,'' her question makes me think twice. I don't want to disappear anymore, I can't just leave without say he's had so much loss and so have I, I look down and smile to myself. 

   " Nothing Gloria. You've done your part. Will have one more day of happiness,'' I say delighted. I can leave if I can leave him with a happy memory of the Ciara he loved.