Just Friends

Part 15: When my world starts crumbling

I ran down the sidewalk. I didn't care where I was going or if I got hit by a bus or anything. All I wanted was to get away. I had to get away from Phil. I didn't know where I was running to. I just ran. I ran blindly, the tears obscured my vision. Running felt good, it hurt so bad but I needed to let the pain out somehow. I ran for what seemed like an eternity.

I found myself at Louise's door. I pressed the doorbell. "Dan oh my God! You look horrible. What happened?"

I blubbered something incoherent; she sat me down on the sofa and handed me a cup of tea. "Start at the beginning when you're ready."

I realized I was gasping for air. I should exercise more. I got my breathing back to almost normal and started. I told her the whole story. She nodded and sipped her tea encouragingly.

When I finished she said, "I'm so sorry Dan. How long were you guys together?"

"Three months." I replied dismally. "Three months that didn't mean anything to him apparently."

She gathered me in a tight hug. "Do you need a place to stay?"

"Yeah. I'm probably going to go to PJ's. He already said I could. I don't want to go back the flat. I have to get my stuff though." I sighed.

"I could help you. You'd be done faster if you had help."

"Okay sure. Thanks Louise!"

Louise and I hung out all day. We watched cartoons with Darcy and just had fun. I felt so emotionally fragile. Halfway through Spongebob Squarepants Louise handed me a box of maltesers. It was so sweet of her that I started crying again. I cried probably every twenty minutes. Every time Darcy looked so concerned for me.

"Dan are you ok?" Said Darcy sweetly.

I smile at her sadly. "No, princess. Someone I love very very much left me and it makes me sad."

Darcy sat down in my lap. "Was she pretty?"

I thought for a second. "Yes, he was gorgeous."

"A boy?" Said Darcy in confusion.

"Yeah." I said sadly.

"Were you guys going to have babies? Was he your husband?" She asked inquisitively.

"No honey. Maybe one day if he hadn't hurt me so much."

"Oh okay." She said and turned back to Spongebob.

Several hours later

"You ready to go Dan?" Asked Louise. She already had a handbag over her shoulder.

I took a deep breath. "Yeah."

Louise and I walked back to the flat in silence. "Are you okay Dan? You don't have to go in." She said as we reached the door.

"No I'm fine." I replied.

I opened the door with shaking hands. The flat was a mess, but that was normal. It was eerily quiet and made me anxious. I chewed on my nails and headed to my bedroom. I threw random clothes and toiletries into my suitcase. Louise guarded the door. I grabbed my camera and laptop. I couldn't fit everything. I guessed I could either pick it up later or let Phil throw it out.

"Dan?" Came a far too familiar voice from the door.

"Go away Phil." I replied. I turned around. He looked horrible. His eyes were red and swollen. He had a glass of wine in his hand and already looked very drunk.

"Danny..." He slurred. "Danny you came back."

"No Phil." I replied. "I came to get my stuff. I'm moving out."

Phil ignored me. "I thought you wouldn't come back. I drew on myself because I was sad. Look Danny." He showed my his arms which were covered in angry red cuts.

My voice cracked. "Phil..."

Louise looked at me warningly.

I made my decision. "Hold my stuff. I'll only be a few minutes."

She nodded. "You'd better."

I picked Phil up and carried him to his room. I set him down carefully on the bed. I tucked him in and kissed him on the forehead. "Go to sleep Philly. I love you."

"I love you too." He mumbled sleepily. My heart broke again. For a second I thought about staying. I left him and went to the kitchen. I wrote him a note. "I came and got some stuff. I'm moving in with PJ. Please don't drink or cut. Take care of yourself. Dan." I left it on the fridge.

I closed the door quietly.

Goodbye Phil.